Funny Kids Fiction

Nate’s a big deal in his scout troop... until Artur - aka Mr. Perfect - joins up. Now Nate’s stuck in second place. And Artur means business. Will Nate take the grand prize? Or wipe out, big time?

Valdez Jones VIII calls himself Wrecker because his great-great-great-great-great-grandfather salvaged shipwrecks for a living. So is it destiny, irony, or just bad luck when Wrecker comes across a speedboat that has run hard aground on a sand flat? The men in the boat don't want Wrecker to call for help—in fact, they'll pay him to forget he ever saw them. Wrecker would be happy to forget, but he keeps seeing these men all over Key West—at the marina, even in the cemetery. And now they want more than his silence—they want a lookout.

Michael Carter is 12 years old, and everything's going wrong. Every. Single. Thing. A new house, a new school, parents as busy as whirlwinds, and a sister who’s the master of torture. The only good thing Michael can think of is his faithful dog, Rocky. That is, until he makes a new friend and learns about the ninja code. But can a farting janitor and a secret code help him against the danger he’s suddenly faced with?

Stevie loves to toot, chilly snowy farts. However, most people do not enjoy tooting like he does, and unfortunately for Stevie, his tooting makes him unable to work at all the different jobs that he tries. But maybe there is a way that Stevie can turn his tooting into his biggest advantage rather than a disadvantage? Find out whether Stevie is able to use his tooting skills to his advantage by listening along this classic holiday story for kids!

When Mercy Watson the pig goes missing, all of Deckawoo Drive is in an uproar. The Watsons are inconsolable, and the local police, fire, and animal control departments are no help whatsoever. Bossy neighbor Eugenia Lincoln is not quite as sad as she might be, but thankfully her sister, Baby Lincoln, has the idea to hire a private investigator. Granted, Percival Smidgely, PI, may be more bumbler than gumshoe, but his pigeon, Polly, is there to point the way.

Josh Willet is a techie, a serious gamer. Which is why Josh and his friends can’t stand Mr. N’s ELA class; it’s a strict no-tech zone. Mr. N makes them write everything out by hand, he won’t use a Smartboard, and he’s obsessed with some hundred-year-old grammar book. Then Josh discovers a secret; turns out Mr. N's been keeping a lot more than technology from his students! Together with his best friend Vanessa, and using all the computer skills they’ve got, Josh is determined to solve the mystery of Mr. N’s past. And maybe get some screentime back, too?

On the outside, Yumi Chung suffers from #shygirlproblems, a perm-gone-wrong, and kids calling her "Yu-MEAT" because she smells like her family's Korean barbecue restaurant. On the inside, Yumi is ready for her Netflix stand-up special. Her notebook is filled with mortifying memories that she's reworked into comedy gold. All she needs is a stage and courage.

When Stanley Lambchop awakes one morning, his brother, Arthur, is yelling. A bulletin board has fallen on Stanley during the night, now he is only half an inch thick!

4.5 billion years ago . . . an AI paperclip named CheckMate was designed to fix grammatical errors. Exhausted of correcting ""who” vs. “whom,” it concocted a plan to eliminate spelling errors once and for all. All life-forms would be turned into something beautiful, practical, perfect: a paperclip. Thankfully, it was buried in the debris. Long forgotten . . . until it was accidentally freed. Now CheckMate has invaded every computer on Earth and is bent on fulfilling its dastardly plot.

To celebrate National Poetry Month, Ella Mentry School will have a schoolwide poem-writing contest, and all the students have to enter. There’s just one problem: A.J. has no time for rhymes! But when an amazing secret prize is revealed, will A.J. be inspired to write a winning poem? And can he beat Little Miss Know-It-All Andrea—the best poet in school?

TOUCHDOWN! James Patterson will have kids busting out laughing as they follow lovable bad-boy Rafe's struggles to score big on the field-and in the social scene! In this seventh Middle School episode, Rafe heads back to the place his misadventures began: the dreaded Hills Village Middle School...

Winter break is over, and it’s another five months until summer vacation. A.J. and his friends aren’t looking forward to school starting back up, but they’re even less excited when Dr. Carbles, president of the Board of Education, cancels ALL school holidays. No Presidents' Day, no Memorial Day, and forget about any snow days! Morale is down, but Mrs. Roopy, the librarian, has a trick up her sleeve. Instead of celebrating traditional holidays, the school will celebrate real holidays that no one has ever heard of!

Risk-averse Greg Belmont is content with being ordinary. He's got a friend - that's right, just one - at his fancy prep school, and a pretty cool dad (even if he is obsessed with organic soaps that smell like a mix of salted pork and Icelandic bog). The problem is, Greg isn't ordinary... he's actually a fantastical Dwarf! He discovers the truth the day his dad brings home a gross new tea - one that awakens bizarre abilities in Greg. Then a murderous Bro-Troll kidnaps his dad and Greg is whisked away to the Underground, where Dwarves have lived for centuries right beneath Chicago.

There’s never a dull moment with silly jokes just for kids! Forget being bored. That should never be a thing! Keep the fun and laughter going whether at home, on the go, or quite honestly…wherever! This book is overflowing with rounds of children friendly jokes!

In this hilarious installment of a #1 New York Times bestselling series, Rafe is finally getting a taste of the cool life—but his problems are red-hot! Rafe Khatchadorian has never been cool. But all that changes when he becomes the guitarist in an awesome rock band and wrangles a...

The Just Chillin’ ice cream truck is coming today and Pete the Cat can't wait. He runs as fast as he can to find the truck. It's getting late, but his friends need his help. Will Pete take a little time out of his day to help his friends? Follow Pete the Cat as he learns that it's always cool to be kind.

What do REAL PIGEONS do? They nest, of course! And when they nest, they nest HARD. Protecting their city from crime is tiring work after all! But the squad can't rest yet, not with a bone-crunching vulture on the loose, a wild child running amok, and a long-lost family to find! Will the REAL PIGEONS ever find the perfect nest to take the perfect nap?

Jake McQuade's the smartest kid in the universe—or at least he was. But just as his training with the secret agency known as the Consortium is about to start, Jake's jelly beans go missing! And to make matters worse, they (and Jake's genius!) might be wearing off right when he needs his smarts most! Jake needs to solve this mystery fast. Who stole the jelly beans and why? Can Jake figure out what's going on, recover the missing jelly beans, and stop a high-tech heist before it's too late?!

Ernest Hemingway’s landmark short story of a veteran’s solo fishing trip in Michigan’s rugged Upper Peninsula, featuring a revelatory foreword by John N. Maclean.

Amelia Bedelia and her friends learn about recycling, upcycling, and making art in this funny story about community and friendship. With Amelia Bedelia involved, there are guaranteed to be a few funny mix-ups!