Urban Fantasy Comedy

Awakened by bloodcurdling screams, Santa Claus springs into action to stop a lethal sickness from infecting his reindeer, only to learn that he's already too late. Christmas is all but ruined. But, when a disgraced alcoholic Christmas elf offers to retrofit the sleigh with highly advanced technology, Santa's hope of saving Christmas is renewed. With a solid plan in place, they hitch the sole surviving reindeer to Santa's sleigh and prepare to launch into the blustery night...until Father Time interrupts Santa's plans with an ultimatum that could kill Christmas forever.

My name is Jessie Flores and I thought I was done being jerked around by witches, dryads, and gods in my quest to become a real-life superhero. Turns out they were just getting started. My father's been kidnapped, a handsome vampire with a shady past won't stop shadowing me, and my best friend's family is actively trying to kill him. Fixing all of that won't be easy, though, since I've been cursed to complete 13 divine trials, while a newb fury haunts my every step. If I fail, I'll die. If I hesitate, my friends will suffer instead.

Modern-day wizard Lily Singer prefers to stay tucked away in her library, studying magic and drinking tea. But with a troublesome witch friend and a past riddled with dangerous secrets, her chances of peace and quiet are slim. Armed with only wits and magic, she must manage her argumentative cat, thwart a plot to steal a powerful artifact, and decide who, amid all this, she can trust.

Betsy Taylor needs a job and amazingly lands the perfect one: selling designer shoes at Macy's. But the other vamps, including sexy Sinclair, don't want their queen selling shoes. And the vampire hunters are becoming a real pain, murdering innocent vampires. It seems that everyone wants something from Betsy.

Life at St Cadfan’s is never dull. There’s the cellar full of unexplained corpses. There’s the struggle to find food when the island is placed under quarantine. And there’s that peculiar staircase in the cellar.... Being a demon in Hell has its own problems. There’s the increasingly impossible torture quotas to meet. There’s the entire horde of Hell waiting for you to slip up and make a mistake. And there’s that weird staircase in the service tunnels.

My name’s Bill Ryder and I’m having a hell of a week. Magic is back, my new roommate is a blob of yellow snot, and my friend Sally has been entombed alive in solid rock. Oh, and I’m dead again, or undead anyway. Life’s not quite finished taking a dump on me yet, though, because now something is hunting vampires in New York City. A smarmy-ass wizard has been called in to investigate – one who’s got a closet full of skeletons and eyes for my girlfriend.

Charged with gross incompetence, Satan is fired from his job as prince of Hell and exiled to that most terrible of places: English suburbia. Forced to live as a human under the name of Jeremy Clovenhoof, the dark lord not only has to contend with the fact that no one recognizes him or gives him the credit he deserves but also has to put up with the bookish war-gamer next door and the voracious man-eater upstairs.

When a suspect explodes mid-interrogation and his office is taken over by an intergalactic despot, undead detective Dan Deadman reckons he's finally hit rock bottom. Banished to a dangerous underground hostel network, Dan becomes embroiled in a mass-murder investigation that will take him from the bowels of Down Here to the depths of the ocean. As the clues run out and the case collapses around him, Dan discovers a sinister plot that could wipe out two whole civilizations, and plunge the planet of Parloo into an endless bloody war.

Rosemary Bell just wants to live a quiet, happy life and raise her daughter as far away from her toxic ex-husband as she can get. But when they move into a decrepit cottage in the woods of Mosswood, Georgia, Rosie realizes her life will never be simple.A gang of meddling neighborhood do-gooders want to run her out of town. The vicious laundromat machines keep eating her spare change. And to top it all off, strange things keep happening around Rosie when she least expects it....

It's a lousy first day on the job for Nina Blackman. A patient, loopy from the anesthesia, bites her. At least he was cute. The next morning, Nina wakes up with a set of razor-sharp fangs, bionic vision, supersonic hearing, and a taste for blood. But there's a good explanation: It's her patient, Long Island vampire Greg Statleon. Is Nina willing to commit to one man for eternity, even if they are perfect for each other?

Dustin Graves has three days to live. The darkling mage has found himself in the company of scoundrels. Maybe that’s what Dustin deserves: a werewolf, a vampire, and a talking sword for teammates, and a rogue sorcerer as his mentor and master. But a doomsday cult has surfaced. Twelve mutilated bodies are found drowned in blood and in wine. The massacre stinks of both the divine and the supernatural. Worst of all, an ancient god sends Dust on a lethal mission, one he must complete in three days. The reward? He gets to live. Well...maybe.

Teri and Phil had never needed their own personal god. But when Phil is passed up for a promotion - again - it's time to take matters into their own hands. And look online. Choosing a god isn't as simple as you would think. There are too many choices; and they often have very hefty prices for their eternal devotion: blood, money, sacrifices, and vows of chastity. But then they find Luka, raccoon god of prosperity. All he wants is a small cut of their good fortune. Oh - and to crash on their couch for a few days.

He's big, burly, and way smarter than your average shapeshifting bear. He's also about to get trapped by his own game...Lou Crushek is a reasonable, mellow, easygoing kind of guy. But when someone starts killing the scumbags he works so hard to bust, that really gets under his fur. Especially when that someone is a curvy she-tiger with a skill set that's turning Crush's lone-bear world upside down - and bringing his passion out of hibernation.

Think your job is purgatory? Try working for the afterlife. For former man of science and very unhappy medium, Dr. Newton Barlow, the frontline between good and evil is starting to get old. With Purgatory a mess of hopeless bureaucracy, banal amateurism and unreliable excitement, he's beginning to crave a challenge. Something big.

A. Huli, beautiful and curiously foxlike, works as a classy prostitute in Moscow's premier hotels, until one client goes inexplicably and fatally berserk at the sight of her and she has to leave in a hurry. Forced to advertise on the Internet, she comes to the attention of an intelligence officer who also happens to be a werewolf.

Katie Woods never thought that she'd be forty-one, divorced, and thrust back into the dating world. To start fresh, Katie uproots her veterinary practice to upstate New York - not exactly the hottest dating scene on the planet. But when an unconscious cougar appears at her clinic, Katie's newly single life gets a much needed jolt of the supernatural kind. After Katie examines the cougar and leaves him caged overnight, she's shocked to find a big strapping specimen of young, hot man in its place.

Love is a hex of a thing. Former childhood sweethearts fake a relationship in this charming, witchy romcom. There’s nothing wrong with being a wallflower. Not to Emmaline Bluewater, anyway. Emma may have been born into witch society, but her days of trying to fit in where she doesn’t belong...

From the author of Fight Club, the classic portrait of the damaged contemporary male psyche, now comes this novel about the apocalyptic marketing possibilities of female pleasure. Beautiful You is Palahniuk's much-anticipated satire of the emerging erotic thriller genre, a mash-up of mommy porn and chick lit à la Sex and the City, and fantasy lit à la Clan of the Cave Bear. Imagine if Ira Levin had a baby with Jean Auel.

Mary Alice Brannigan doesn’t believe in the supernatural. Nor does she expect to find that Dreamland, the decaying amusement park she’s been hired to restore, is a prison for the five Untouchables, the most powerful demons in the history of the world. Plus, there’s a guy she’s falling hard for, and there’s something about him that’s not quite right.

No stranger to fear since meeting the unhuman Inspector Hobbes, Andy Caplet fears getting fired from his reporting job (again). His main concern, though, is a shady property developer who has designs on Sorenchester Common, and more annoyingly on his wife. Perhaps a trip to the mountains will help him relax, but this proves even more perilous with foul weather, inedible food, brigands, and a terrifying cruise. Fortunately, mountain leopards, Yetis and Flossy, the yak, take a shine to Andy.