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  • Single on Purpose

  • Redefine Everything. Find Yourself First.
  • Written by: John Kim
  • Narrated by: John Kim
  • Length: 5 hrs and 17 mins
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (141 ratings)

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Single on Purpose

Written by: John Kim
Narrated by: John Kim
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Publisher's Summary

The author of I Used to Be a Miserable F*ck, The Angry Therapist, now teaches you how to prioritize your relationship with yourself and live a more meaningful life, whether you’re alone, dating, or with a partner.

There’s more to life than loving someone. But being single can feel like a death sentence. Why does being alone equal being lonely? And why do we stop working on ourselves when we’re in a relationship? 

After a painful divorce, “The Angry Therapist” John Kim realized he had never truly been on his own. He went on a journey to rebuild his relationship with himself, going from alone and disconnected to alone and fulfilled. Kim has gone on to help thousands of clients find their own unique way to break free of expectations and finally live their truth. 

With Single on Purpose, Kim takes his signature no-BS “self-help in a shot glass” approach as he shares his own singlehood story and shows listeners how to own their shit, break their patterns, and find a grounded sense of self. 

Spending time to cultivate your relationship with yourself shouldn’t be something you only do when you hit rock bottom, go through a major loss, or have a quarter-life crisis. All of us, at some point, need to be single - on purpose. 

©2021 John Kim (P)2021 HarperCollins Publishers

What listeners say about Single on Purpose

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  • S
  • 2023-07-20

for beginners

after 10 years of mostly singleness, this book is really stale advice. pick up guitar, buy a motorcycle, take yourself out for a nice meal and get to therapy. so disappointing. I was hoping it would say something new. after chasing my dreams and learning new things for years to outrun my loneliness, I've discovered it does NOT replace having a partner. being alone when you don't want to be is just fucking hard and no matter how many hobbies you find or how well you are doing in your career or how many great friends you have, downloading Duolingo isn't going to fill that empty space in your life. nothing can and nothing will. make your social media page look like a self help book all you want, you'll never replace romantic love with doing other stuff. I'm not saying you won't be happy. I'm just saying this book makes it sound like all you have to do is set a few boundaries and buy a guitar, and that's simply not true.

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9 people found this helpful

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Loved this book!

This book made me feel like I can be in control of my life. I can be happy both single or in a relationship. Big fan!

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3 people found this helpful

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    2 out of 5 stars
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Very little insight

The book is primarily a collection of stories. I spent the entire time waiting for something insightful or remotely scientific.

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2 people found this helpful

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Loved it

I love the style of this book it’s raw it’s real there’s no bullshit. John Kim reads it himself which I really like. It kept my interest the entire time which I find very difficult to do with most books - so this worked really well for me. I love how positive it is… some of the other books I’ve been reading, have been somewhat depressing, but he gives real Tips on how to move forward I like that highly recommend.

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SPECTACULAR!! 💞

John is incredible! I loved everything about this book.! I'm starting it again immediately.
I've been single for years and John has given me a beautiful gift of a fresh new beautiful look at being single. Thank you John, I've learned a lot from you 😊💞

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Vulgar

I was out went he recommended you just go out and f$&k someone and or have a threesome. Actual words .. wow. It’s true, anyone can write a book. No wonder this guy has so many stories on failed relationships. ( he thinks makes him wise) if you want advice from someone with a horny college boy vibe this is the book for you.

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Not for me

I got this because of all the fulsome +ve reviews. This was mostly a chronicle of the Authors romantic life with some 'learnings" interspersed. If thats your thing great but it wasnt for me. I understand that SOME detail is needed to help provide context and flow but Im not interested in an autobiography, which is what this is - with some learnings integrated into the weave of the story. The learnings are quite trite - do not mean to be offensive but its like 5 bullets that you will find on pinterest if you google 'broken heart" or "Love".. For context on the kind of book I do like and expected to read, Emotional First Aid by Guy Winch - thats the bar for me. Again.... the author is sincere and talks openly about his life and some people may glean things from another persons life story narrated in exacting detail. Not me.

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Definitely wouldn’t recommend

Felt like listening to a dude rambling on and on about his unhealthy relationships… not at all what I was expecting. Gave up 3/4 of the way through as found the book more frustrating than inspiring or even entertaining.

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Straight up and relatable

Written and narrated in a way that lends to feeling as though your being walked through a story of one’s life and struggles while being witness to their biting inner monologue. It was funny, fresh and relevant.

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Authentic

Loved the authentic, honest and inspiring book. Highly recommend!!!!! If you’re lost in your past.

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  • Emily Braun
  • 2021-01-27

Relationship junky!

I’m a straight up relationship junky. I have been in one most of my adult life. I also have this weird going back to my ex’s thing. I finished this book in 12 hours. It helped me in the most vulnerable place of leaving a 7 yr on again off again mildly abusive relationship that had major abusive events that warranted this to end long ago. I realized before I got this book that I had a fear of being alone so I needed a book that could get me through the first 48 hours. I bought 3 books on being single or alone and this is the one that I finished because it resonated with me the most. The book is not focused on only relationship junkies in no way but the fear of being alone is the topic I really needed and this book truly helped. Good luck to others on their soul searching journey on learning to be alone and single on purpose.

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18 people found this helpful

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  • Aisling
  • 2021-03-15

Feels like a bumper sticker

This book had a lot of great nuggets of wisdom and advice but towards the end it felt like bumper sticker self help. Additionally, if you’re not upper middle class then some of the examples and “life goals” might not be the best examples, at least that’s how it felt to me. Like, the “dreams and goals” referenced in the book like they’re things we all strive for were not hitting home with me at all, and I don’t believe I’m the only person who doesn’t define success with matching bmws... I suggest this book for a light hearted look at oneself but doing the work will take a lot more than the reach for the stars advice given here

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10 people found this helpful

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  • Alexis
  • 2021-01-13

Powerful & practical tips for everyone’s journey to know themselves

Having read I Used To Be A Miserable F*ck, I love John Kim’s ability to authentically connect with his readers drawing from his own life experiences. This book was filled with powerful truths about how many of us don’t really know ourselves because our identities are tied other relationships, our work, etc., and how being single is the best time to put in the work toward creating the life we want. No nonsense, just honesty, wisdom, and humor.

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6 people found this helpful

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  • Matt McLaughlin
  • 2021-02-26

Awesome, awesome, awesome.

This book speaks! It really broke down where I was and helped me see a bright future. I feel free and excited about my next adventure.

Great concepts and ideas.

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5 people found this helpful

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  • Sonia Sidhu
  • 2021-02-27

Pleasantly surprised

This past year, I’ve started (and exchanged) more books on forgiveness, inner strength, things we can’t change, and self improvement than I ever imagined I would. I didn’t think this one would be any different from the many I’ve exchanged/returned. I was pleasantly surprised.

This book spoke to many of my experiences, especially as a child of immigrants who had particular expectations of their children. I’m so glad I gave this book a chance. I believe it’s one that I’ll come back to listen to at least once. I may even buy a copy of the text so I can reread the most relevant parts.

The author used language in a manner that was familiar and comfortable to me as a listener, as compared to a couple books on self compassion (which would be great reads, but sounded terrible when narrated).

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4 people found this helpful

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  • Fernanda
  • 2023-02-19

Disappointed

Author just talked about himself most of the time , did not get anything out of this . Had high hopes for it . Don’t waste your time

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3 people found this helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 2023-06-27

Don’t really like the book

I didn’t care for this book. The Author had a fowl mouth and I didn’t understand why he needed to do all of that to express himself. The book was too long and I just picked things out of his book that I thought I would enjoy. Some people really enjoyed his book but I’m glad I purchased it on audible not a hard copy.
Vickie who is single and happy

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  • Anonymous User
  • 2023-03-11

Just what I needed at this point in my life!! So amazing and on point!

I am 40 and just now learning who I am, especially considering I became a wife and mom at 20! I have now read and listened to this book and will continue to do so when I need to bring myself back to center! Thank you so much for your advise!

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  • Peter J. Buckingham
  • 2023-01-09

Interesting yet alarming

I am a clinical counselor, so I did not get this book in order to “self-help” myself. I was looking for a possible tool to give to clients. What I found, however, was an alarming account of an impaired counselor who burned out and then found his way back to counseling, while also expressing a distain for clinical counseling.

I recognize my bias as a professional counselor, yet, though the author does provide helpful directives, the overall tone and theme of the book left much to be desired.

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  • Lezlie Butler
  • 2022-12-24

Needed different narrator

Did not enjoy the narration - this makes or breaks an audiobook. If the voicing does not flow well or tone is ‘off’ I can’t keep going. Reading the book would be better but unfortunately I won’t spend more money to buy the book.

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2 people found this helpful