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  • The Origins of You

  • How Breaking Family Patterns Can Liberate the Way We Live and Love
  • Written by: Vienna Pharaon
  • Narrated by: Vienna Pharaon
  • Length: 8 hrs and 32 mins
  • 4.9 out of 5 stars (18 ratings)

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The Origins of You

Written by: Vienna Pharaon
Narrated by: Vienna Pharaon
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Publisher's Summary

NATIONAL BESTSELLER

From licensed therapist and popular Instagram relationship expert Vienna Pharaon (@mindfulmft, +683K followers) comes a profound guide to understanding and overcoming wounds from your Family of Origin—the foundation of how we relate to others, ourselves, and the world around us.


None of us had a perfect childhood; we are all carrying around behaviors that don’t serve us—and may in fact be hurting us. But it doesn’t have to be that way, says licensed marriage and family therapist Vienna Pharaon. Our past might create our patterns, but we can change those patterns for the better...with the right tools.

In The Origins of You, Pharaon has unlocked a healing process to help us understand our Family of Origin—the family and framework we grew up within—and examine what worked (and didn’t) in that system. Unhealed pain (or “wounds”) in that Family of Origin will manifest in our adult behaviors in surprising ways, from work challenges to interpersonal struggles. But the good news: armed with the knowledge about our past, we can actually rewire our programming to meaningfully improve our relationships and our lives, right now and in the future.

It doesn’t matter whether you’ve been in therapy for decades, or whether therapy isn’t for you. It doesn’t matter if you had a great childhood, or a terrible one. You can create change and resolve things from the past that need your attention. Complete with guided introspection, personal experiences, client stories, and frameworks for having difficult conversations to complement each chapter, The Origins of You will teach you how to break family patterns and help you liberate the way you live and love.

©2023 Vienna Pharaon (P)2023 Penguin Audio

What the critics say

One of Amazon’s Best Books of the Month
One of Hollywood Reporter’s Best Gifts for Sparking Optimism

The Origins of You offers us a promise: our family of origin, no matter how damaged it might have been, does not determine our destiny. With empathy and wisdom, Vienna Pharaon explains how our past creates our patterns—patterns we’re still living out today—and how we can shift those habits to create a new, healthier path for ourselves. Vienna's book is a gift.” —Nedra Glover Tawwab, author of Set Boundaries, Find Peace

“Change your behavior, change your life. Licensed therapist and relationship expert Vienna Pharaon wrote The Origins of You to help readers break unhealthy patterns of behavior in order to enjoy a better way of life. Each chapter includes worksheets for introspection, which will help you heal old wounds to create meaningful change in relationships with others as well as yourself.” Hollywood Reporter

“[Pharaon] offers tools to communicate and set boundaries in relationships, and encourages readers to make changes to take control of their own relationship dynamics and move beyond their past trauma…She encourages readers to seek out therapy, while still offering them a starting place to understand their trauma and guide them through the work that they will need to do as they move forward…Will appeal to fans of Pharaon’s Instagram page and those seeking a self-help guide to help them navigate family patterns and take control of their love lives.” Library Journal

What listeners say about The Origins of You

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Life Changjng!

I recommend this for every human on this planet! The way Vienna walks through each wound with such clarity allows you to quickly identify what resonates with you... then you can start to do the necessary work.
So absolutely, beautifully written!

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  • Jas
  • 2023-03-01

Enlightening !!

Could not stop soaking it all... was obsessed with this book. Very easy to understand. So many l great lessons and discoveries. A MUST read for understanding of yourself!!

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10/10!

Beautifully eye opening and a clear perspective on why we are the way we are and why we act the way we do. So thankful I gave the time to listen. Not to mention Vienna’s self narration of her book is the sweet cherry on top.

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  • Ree
  • 2024-02-02

Worth the Time and Cost

The narration from the author comes across as authentic and genuine.
The stories expressed in the book help to add context to the lessons being imparted.
This is an excellent place to start a self-understanding journey.
If I were to listen to only one book this year, it would be this one.

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Eye opening

This book is life-changing. The real life accounts bring the core wounds to life and help us see how our past plays out in the present. The author’s way of reading is empathetic and easy to listen to.

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Dozens of hours of therapy in one book

This book is -amazing-. It takes the idea of healing your inner child without a focus on victimhood. It allows for examining the impact your parents had on you with ou being disempowering. Please take the time to complete the prompts at the end of any chapter that apply to you. I had so many “aha” moments while listening to this book. It’s literally the first personal development book I’ve ever finished in full, and I finished it in 2 weeks. Thank you Vienna, for sharing your beautiful insights with the world ❤️

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An amazing read!

Using this book along with therapy is a game changer. I’ve gained insight into my wounds and a path to healing.

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Incredible Insights

Really enjoyed listening to Vienna’s calming voice and pointed questioning. So easy to absorb! I have come away with so much more information about myself even having crossed the ‘halfway’ portion of my life, and consuming several wonderful roadmaps by other healers! Thank you for this!

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One of the best psychology books I’ve read.

While I personally think it’s a little reductive to say most if not all your problems stem from childhood wounds, the author definitely does great job in explaining how our personal wounds and trauma inform our behaviors in our relationships. What I liked most about this book is the amount of accountability she puts on each person for their own behaviors and in solving both their own problems and problems in relationships to which they are contributing. It’s a refreshing point of view that I had been having a hard time finding someone who addressed that accountability and responsibility.

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