We discuss why it’s useful to identify the "ugliest thing" in your life—i.e., what aspect needs the most attention? We also share an easy hack about enhancing family memories, and we explore a Four-Tendencies situation involving a young-adult son's surprising reaction to his father's lateness. We wrap up with listener suggestions for creative before-and-after photo books.

Resources & links related to this episode:

• Order your copy of Secrets of Adulthood
• After Hours with Jamie Rubin podcast
• The Four Tendencies
• Take The "Four Tendencies" Quiz
• Download the Happier app
• Elizabeth is reading: Climbing in Heels by Elaine Goldsmith-Thomas (Amazon, Bookshop)
• Gretchen is reading: Two Serious Ladies by Jane Bowles (Amazon, Bookshop)

Get in touch: podcast@gretchenrubin.com

Visit Gretchen's website to learn more about Gretchen's best-selling books, products from The Happiness Project Collection, and the Happier app.

Find the transcript for this episode on the episode details page in the Apple Podcasts app.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

With time and experience, we learn “Secrets of Adulthood,” and parenthood teaches us many of those lessons.

Resources & links related to this episode:

• "Secrets of Adulthood"

Get in touch: podcast@gretchenrubin.com

Visit Gretchen's website to learn more about Gretchen's best-selling books, products from The Happiness Project Collection, and the Happier app.

Find the transcript for this episode on the episode details page in the Apple Podcasts app.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In a recent Secrets of Adulthood Substack Live conversation, I talked to the terrific Shannon Watts, founder of Moms Demand Action (the nation’s largest grassroots group fighting gun violence. We discuss insights from her latest book and how we've arrived at several of our own Secrets of Adulthood, including why it’s important to ask yourself whether your life goals are your own or someone else's, the cost of indecision, and when to double-back or double-down.

Resources & links related to this episode:

• Subscribe to Secrets of Adulthood on Substack
• Playing with Fire by Shannon Watts on Substack

Get in touch: podcast@gretchenrubin.com

Visit Gretchen's website to learn more about Gretchen's best-selling books, products from The Happiness Project Collection, and the Happier app.

Find the transcript for this episode on the episode details page in the Apple Podcasts app.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.