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In this conversation, I’m joined by therapist and coach Gavin Lashley to explore a topic that often may not get enough attention the psychological journey of the non-birth partner, affectionately, “Dad”.

Gavin is an integrative therapist working with CBT and Internal Family Systems, and he’s also a relatively new father himself. Together, we explore what it really means to become a parent, not just practically, but emotionally and relationally.

We talk about:

• The identity shift of becoming a Dad
• Protecting and providing versus connecting and regulating
• Hormones, expectations and the pressure on modern Dads
• Community, isolation and the changing role of grandparents
• The impact on intimacy and the couple relationship
• Psychological preparation before the baby arrives
• Resentment, repair and communication under pressure
• Trauma anxiety and the fear of “getting it wrong”
• Why perfection isn’t the goal, repair is

You can find out more about Gavin and his work here:
Website: (https://www.gavinlashleytherapy.com)
Instagram: (https://www.instagram.com/gavinlashleytherapy/)

Gavin also wrote a blog article exploring different approaches to fatherhood using the analogy of ecosystems, which links really well to this conversation: (https://www.gavinlashleytherapy.com/blog/cultivating-fatherhood/)

✅ If you're thinking about exploring therapy generally, I’d love to hear from you and you’re very welcome to get in touch with me via my website (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk) to find out more or to arrange an initial conversation.

🎯 1:1 Mentoring & Consultancy

Thinking about changing career to become a therapist? Already qualified and wanting to start up a private therapy practice? In private practice and looking to grow? Or maybe you're curious about sharing your voice on YouTube? I offer supportive, one-to-one mentoring on career change and becoming a therapist, starting and building a private practice, and creating meaningful content on YouTube. All the details are on my website: (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk)

🎁 My FREE personal development course 'Life Unlimited: 10 Steps to Real Change' is now available on this channel in a playlist on the homepage.

Whether you’re looking to move through anxiety, stress, depression, chronic anger, addictive behaviour, co-dependency, narcissism, low self-esteem/confidence, relationship problems, feeling stuck, lost or lacking in purpose – or simply want to experience more happiness, contentment and fulfilment in your life – this course is carefully designed to help you do just that.

‘Life Unlimited’ Course testimonials include:

"John-Paul's course Life Unlimited more than lives up to its promise as a practical and accessible guide to making meaningful, positive changes in your life. He takes you on a clear path towards self-awareness and self-acceptance, helping you to set healthy boundaries in your relationships with others."

"The course is packed with valuable content, yet John-Paul's warm, non-judgemental style makes it feel more as if a friend is sharing some wonderful wisdom. 100% recommend."

Support the show

If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk

Send a text

What happens when someone discloses that they’re bisexual within a relationship? For some couples it’s straightforward, but for others it can bring up shock, fear, confusion, or insecurity for both partners.

In this video I share some reflections on why disclosure can feel destabilising at first, how both people’s reactions are understandable, and how couples can move toward integration over time. I also talk about common myths around bisexuality, including fears about infidelity or commitment and why honesty, while sometimes painful, can ultimately deepen connection.

If you or your partner are navigating this situation, I hope this offers some reassurance and perspective.

I’ll also be exploring this topic further in an upcoming interview with Dr Joshua Gebhardt, a therapist who works with mixed-orientation couples.

My bisexuality playlist for all the full videos: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLbzuc1SEOTxi2ytIA_kG2JG_7Evikg8E0

✅ If you're thinking about exploring therapy generally, I’d love to hear from you and you’re very welcome to get in touch with me via my website (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk) to find out more or to arrange an initial conversation.

🎯 1:1 Mentoring & Consultancy

Thinking about changing career to become a therapist? Already qualified and wanting to start up a private therapy practice? In private practice and looking to grow? Or maybe you're curious about sharing your voice on YouTube? I offer supportive, one-to-one mentoring on career change and becoming a therapist, starting and building a private practice, and creating meaningful content on YouTube. All the details are on my website: (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk)

🎁 My FREE personal development course Life Unlimited: 10 Steps to Real Change is now available on this channel in a playlist on the homepage.

Whether you’re looking to move through anxiety, stress, depression, chronic anger, addictive behaviour, co-dependency, narcissism, low self-esteem/confidence, relationship problems, feeling stuck, lost or lacking in purpose – or simply want to experience more happiness, contentment and fulfilment in your life – this course is carefully designed to help you do just that.

Support the show

If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk

Send a text

Starting to see clients for the first time can feel surprisingly nerve-wracking. In this video I share some reflections on how to steady yourself in those early sessions and what really matters when you first sit down with a client.

I talk about four foundations you can rest on: what you already bring as a person, the active role of the client, the power of the relationship between you, and the wider support that holds you as a therapist. I think a helpful aim isn’t to perform or impress, but to create a safe, attentive human connection.

If you’re just beginning to see clients, or about to start, I hope this offers some reassurance and perspective.

🎯 1:1 Mentoring & Consultancy

Thinking about changing career to become a therapist? Already qualified and wanting to start up a private therapy practice? In private practice and looking to grow? Or maybe you're curious about sharing your voice on YouTube? I offer supportive, one-to-one mentoring on career change and becoming a therapist, starting and building a private practice, and creating meaningful content on YouTube. All the details are on my website: (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk)

✅ If you're thinking about exploring therapy generally, I’d love to hear from you and you’re very welcome to get in touch with me via my website (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk) to find out more or to arrange an initial conversation.

🎁 My FREE personal development course Life Unlimited: 10 Steps to Real Change is now available on this channel in a playlist on the homepage.

Whether you’re looking to move through anxiety, stress, depression, chronic anger, addictive behaviour, co-dependency, narcissism, low self-esteem/confidence, relationship problems, feeling stuck, lost or lacking in purpose – or simply want to experience more happiness, contentment and fulfilment in your life – this course is carefully designed to help you do just that.

Life Unlimited Course testimonials include:

"John-Paul's course Life Unlimited more than lives up to its promise as a practical and accessible guide to making meaningful, positive changes in your life. He takes you on a clear path towards self-awareness and self-acceptance, helping you to set healthy boundaries in your relationships with others."

"The course is packed with valuable content, yet John-Paul's warm, non-judgemental style makes it feel more as if a friend is sharing some wonderful wisdom. 100% recommend."

Support the show

If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk

Send us a text

Human Connection in a Digital World

In this video, I’m sharing a practice version of a talk I gave for Rail Wellbeing Live on one of the most important foundations of good mental health: connection. After 15 years as a therapist, I’ve come to see connection, to ourselves, to others, and to the wider world, as central to wellbeing, meaning, and resilience.

In this talk, I look at:
• Why connection is vital for both mental and physical health
• Why so many people feel increasingly disconnected, despite knowing this
• How our survival, reward, and connection systems shape the way we relate
• Practical ways to strengthen connection with ourselves
• How digital media, social media, and AI can both support and undermine connection
• The role of face-to-face relationships, nature, and small moments of human contact

This is a reflective, practical talk rather than a polished studio video, shared here for anyone interested in wellbeing, mental health, and how we stay human in an increasingly digital world.

If you find this helpful, it would mean a lot if you could like the video, subscribe to the channel, or share it with someone who might benefit. It really helps the channel grow and supports me in making more content like this.

✅ If you're thinking about exploring therapy generally, I’d love to hear from you and you’re very welcome to get in touch with me via my website (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk) to find out more or to arrange an initial conversation.

🎯 1:1 Mentoring & Consultancy
Thinking about changing career to become a therapist? Already qualified and wanting to start up a private therapy practice? In private practice and looking to grow? Or maybe you’re curious about sharing your voice on YouTube? I offer supportive, one-to-one mentoring on career change and becoming a therapist, starting and building a private practice, and creating meaningful content on YouTube. All the details are on my website: (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk)

🎁 My FREE personal development course 'Life Unlimited: 10 Steps to Real Change' is now available on this channel in a playlist on the homepage.
Whether you’re looking to move through anxiety, stress, depression, chronic anger, addictive behaviour, co-dependency, narcissism, low self-esteem/confidence, relationship problems, feeling stuck, lost or lacking in purpose – or simply want to experience more happiness, contentment and fulfilment in your life – this course is carefully designed to help you do just that.

‘Life Unlimited’ Course testimonials include:
"John-Paul's course Life Unlimited more than lives up to its promise as a practical and accessible guide to making meaningful, positive changes in your life. He takes you on a clear path towards self-awareness and self-acceptance, helping you to set healthy boundaries in your relationships with others."
"The course is packed with valuable content, yet John-Paul's warm, non-judgemental style makes it feel more as if a friend is sharing some wonderful wisdom. 100% recommend."

📹 For more videos on general mental health topics, here's my playlist:
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLbzuc1SEOTxgkW-m76gMYwIEq_IZUv8sl

Support the show

If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk

Send a text

Thinking about a career change? If you’ve been wondering whether it’s possible to leave a job that isn’t fulfilling and explore something completely new, like becoming a therapist, this video is for you. I share clips from my own journey, plus insights from people making the change right now, to help you feel more ready to take that first step.

This video is a compilation of some of the most helpful moments from my videos on career change and therapist training, alongside reflections from people who are currently on that path themselves.

We talk about:
– What draws people towards becoming a therapist
– The emotional and psychological side of training
– The importance of self-development, not just theory
– Fear, doubt, and how not to let them dominate decisions
– Why this path can feel like coming home and coming alive

If you’re feeling stuck, unfulfilled, or quietly wondering whether there’s something more meaningful for you, I hope this video helps you listen to that part of yourself that’s already moving you forward.

I’d really love to hear about your own experience or where you are on your journey, so please do feel free to comment below.

Playlist containing at the full videos here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLbzuc1SEOTxjNIi7jqHqNHDcaHqhApCoN

🎯 1:1 Mentoring & Consultancy

Thinking about changing career to become a therapist? Already qualified and wanting to start up a private therapy practice? In private practice and looking to grow? Or maybe you're curious about sharing your voice on YouTube? I offer supportive, one-to-one mentoring on career change and becoming a therapist, starting and building a private practice, and creating meaningful content on YouTube. All the details are on my website: (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk)

✅ If you're thinking about exploring therapy generally, I’d love to hear from you and you’re very welcome to get in touch with me via my website (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk) to find out more or to arrange an initial conversation.

🎁 My FREE personal development course 'Life Unlimited: 10 Steps to Real Change' is now available on this channel in a playlist on the homepage.

Whether you’re looking to move through anxiety, stress, depression, chronic anger, addictive behaviour, co-dependency, narcissism, low self-esteem/confidence, relationship problems, feeling stuck, lost or lacking in purpose – or simply want to experience more happiness, contentment and fulfilment in your life – this course is carefully designed to help you do just that.

💬 ‘Life Unlimited’ Course testimonials include:

"John-Paul's course Life Unlimited more than lives up to its promise as a practical and accessible guide to making meaningful, positive changes in your life. He takes you on a clear path towards self-awareness and self-acceptance, helping you to set healthy boundaries in your relationships with others."

"The course is packed with valuable content, yet John-Paul's warm, non-judgemental style makes it feel more as if a friend is sharing some wonderful wisdom. 100% recommend."

Support the show

If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk

Send us a text

This is a compilation of what I think are some of the most meaningful moments from my videos and conversations on bisexuality so far, including pieces from my chats with Rob Brooks Cohen, Robyn Ochs, Tom Ward-Thomas and Mark Cuzack, as well as clips from my own videos on self-acceptance, coming out, finding community and living more fully as a bi person.

Bisexuality can be a really misunderstood and underrepresented experience. I hope this compilation brings together some honesty, vulnerability and helpful advice from everyone who’s contributed, from personal stories to conversations about identity, self-acceptance, loneliness, integration and community. If you’re questioning, exploring, or just looking to feel less alone, I really hope this helps.

My bisexuality playlist for all the full videos: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLbzuc1SEOTxi2ytIA_kG2JG_7Evikg8E0

If you’d like to explore more from Mark or Rob, you can find their channels here:
Mark Cuzack – (https://www.youtube.com/@notdefining)
Rob Brooks Cohen – (https://www.youtube.com/@2biguys)

If anything in this video connects with you or brings things up, you’re very welcome to get in touch with me via my website (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk).

✅ If you're thinking about exploring therapy generally, I’d love to hear from you and you’re very welcome to get in touch with me via my website (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk) to find out more or to arrange an initial conversation.

🎁 My FREE personal development course 'Life Unlimited: 10 Steps to Real Change' is now available on this channel in a playlist on the homepage.

Whether you’re looking to move through anxiety, stress, depression, chronic anger, addictive behaviour, co-dependency, narcissism, low self-esteem/confidence, relationship problems, feeling stuck, lost or lacking in purpose – or simply want to experience more happiness, contentment and fulfilment in your life – this course is carefully designed to help you do just that.

‘Life Unlimited’ Course testimonials include:

"John-Paul's course Life Unlimited more than lives up to its promise as a practical and accessible guide to making meaningful, positive changes in your life. He takes you on a clear path towards self-awareness and self-acceptance, helping you to set healthy boundaries in your relationships with others."

"The course is packed with valuable content, yet John-Paul's warm, non-judgemental style makes it feel more as if a friend is sharing some wonderful wisdom. 100% recommend."

Support the show

If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk

Send us a text

In this video I’m talking with Dr Will Dobud about something I’ve barely touched on before: youth mental health.

Anxiety, depression, self-harm and distress in teenagers are reported to have risen dramatically in recent years, even as diagnoses, services and medications have increased. Will and I explore why that might be and, crucially, what actually helps.

Will is a social worker, therapist, educator and researcher based in Australia, and co-author (with Dr Nevin Harper) of the book “Kids These Days”, which I highly recommend if you’re interested in youth mental health and what adults can realistically do to support young people.

In this conversation we talk about:

* Why distress in teenagers appears to be rising and why “kids these days” might not be the real problem
* Social media, phone bans and whether banning tech actually improves mental health
* Loneliness, “engagement problems” and why so many young people feel unseen even when surrounded by others at school
* Outdoor and adventure-based therapy, and how mastery and success experiences support wellbeing
* Labels, self-diagnosis and identity, including the risks of young people becoming their diagnosis
* The importance of relationship and connection in therapy and in families
* Parents’ and caregivers’ own anxiety and histories, and how that shapes how we respond to teens
* How everyday activities, rituals and shared experiences can build stronger relationships with young people

I really hope this feels supportive whether you’re a parent, carer, therapist, teacher or simply someone who cares about the young people in your life.

You can find more about Will and his work here:
Kids These Days book and resources: (https://www.kidsthesedaysbook.com)
Will’s website: (https://www.willdobud.com)
The Celebrate Everyday video: https://www.facebook.com/share/v/16YtPy4tJM/

✅ If you're thinking about exploring therapy generally, I’d love to hear from you and you’re very welcome to get in touch with me via my website (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk) to find out more or to arrange an initial conversation.

🎯 **1:1 Mentoring & Consultancy**

Thinking about changing career to become a therapist? Already qualified and wanting to start up a private therapy practice? In private practice and looking to grow? Or maybe you're curious about sharing your voice on YouTube? I offer supportive, one-to-one mentoring on career change and becoming a therapist, starting and building a private practice, and creating meaningful content on YouTube. All the details are on my website.

🎁 **My FREE personal development course 'Life Unlimited: 10 Steps to Real Change' is now available on this channel in a playlist on the homepage.**

Whether you’re looking to move through anxiety, stress, depression, chronic anger, addictive behaviour, co-dependency, narcissism, low self-esteem/confidence, relationship problems, feeling stuck, lost or lacking in purpose – or simply want to experience more happiness, contentment and fulfilment in your life – this course is carefully designed to help you do just that.

**‘Life Unlimited’ Course testimonials include:**

"John-Paul's course Life Unlimited more than lives up to its promise as a practical and accessible guide to making meaningful, positive changes in your life. He takes you on a clear path towards self-awareness and self-acceptance, helping you to set healthy boundaries in your r

Support the show

If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk

Send us a text

Changing career doesn’t start with confidence, I think it starts with small choices that help you feel more connected to yourself.

In this video I talk honestly about confidence and career change and why you don’t need to feel confident before you start. I share how my own move from law into psychotherapy began not with certainty, but with small choices based on connection: taking a career break, trying out training, volunteering and noticing where I felt most “at home”.

I walk through a simple process of connection → choice → competence → clarity, and how confidence tends to grow naturally from those stages rather than being a starting point. I also talk about bringing your existing skills with you, planning realistically for the financial transition, and how your relationship with money, status and success may change over time.

Towards the end of the video I share two “compare and contrast” memories, one from a high-pressure financial close as a lawyer and one from a 40-year celebration at my psychotherapy college, to give you a felt sense of the difference between a more disconnected life and one that feels aligned and alive.

If you’re thinking about changing career or retraining as a therapist, I hope this gives you some reassurance, some practical ideas, and a bit more compassion for yourself, especially if you don’t feel ready yet!

If anything in this video connects with you, I’d really love to hear from you in the comments with any questions, worries, hopes, or your own experience of thinking about a career change. And if you find it helpful, please do like, share and subscribe, it really helps the channel.

🎯 **1:1 Mentoring & Consultancy**

Thinking about changing career to become a therapist? Already qualified and wanting to start up a private therapy practice? In private practice and looking to grow? Or maybe you're curious about sharing your voice on YouTube? I offer supportive, one-to-one mentoring on career change and becoming a therapist, starting and building a private practice, and creating meaningful content on YouTube. All the details are on my website: (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk)

✅ If you're thinking about exploring therapy generally, I’d love to hear from you and you’re very welcome to get in touch with me via my website (https://www.thistrustedplace.co.uk) to find out more or to arrange an initial conversation.

🎁 **My FREE personal development course 'Life Unlimited: 10 Steps to Real Change' is now available on this channel in a playlist on the homepage.**

Whether you’re looking to move through anxiety, stress, depression, chronic anger, addictive behaviour, co-dependency, narcissism, low self-esteem/confidence, relationship problems, feeling stuck, lost or lacking in purpose – or simply want to experience more happiness, contentment and fulfilment in your life – this course is carefully designed to help you do just that.

**‘Life Unlimited’ Course testimonials include:**

"John-Paul's course Life Unlimited more than lives up to its promise as a practical and accessible guide to making meaningful, positive changes in your life. He takes you on a clear path towards self-awareness and self-acceptance, helping you to set healthy boundaries in your relationships with others."
"The course is packed with valuable content, yet John-Paul's warm, non-judgemental style makes it feel more as if a friend is sharing some wonderful wisdom. 100% recommend."

Support the show

If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk