In today's episode, we explore the complexities of an issue that's close to the hearts of parents, teachers, and students alike—college readiness. Alongside my friend and co-author Bill Stixrud, we discuss the crucial aspects that determine whether a high-school student is truly ready to take on the challenges of college life. We start by questioning the common rush towards college right after high school, bringing to light the concerning rates of dropout and burnout among college freshmen. Our conversation covers effective strategies for assessing and enhancing readiness, emphasizing the importance of emotional resilience and maturity over mere academic preparation. Listen in to gain insights into making the transition to college successful and sustainable.

Episode Highlights:
[2:26] College readiness and mental health challenges among students.
[7:05] College readiness, stress tolerance, and emotional resilience.
[12:21] Prioritizing life skills over academic achievement.
[14:40] College readiness and the importance of self-care for students.
[19:53] Importance of sleep for adolescent brain development and academic success.
[24:29] Executive functions, self-evaluation, and stress management in adolescents.
[30:10] Stress management and self-care for high-achieving students.
[35:08] College preparation and stress management for high school students.


Links & Resources:
Visit SelfDrivenChild.com for more resources on developing autonomy and resilience in children.
For further insights into college readiness and effective stress management strategies, check out the books “The Self-Driven Child” and “What Do You Say?” by Ned Johnson and Bill Stixrud.

If today's discussion resonated with you, consider exploring our books and resources to better prepare for the college journey ahead. Remember to rate, follow, share, and review our podcast if you find our content valuable. Here's to nurturing a self-driven and resilient next generation!

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

In this episode of the Self-Driven Child Podcast, we're discussing the ever-tumultuous world of college admissions with special guest Jeff Selingo, a seasoned expert and author who's spent over two decades exploring higher education. We’ll dissect the complexities of the admissions process, the heightened stress it causes students and parents alike, and ponder the crucial question: can anything be done to alleviate this pressure? Join us as we navigate through Jeff’s latest insights and offer a fresh perspective on making the journey to college less daunting.

Episode Highlights:
[02:41] - Jeff shatters any illusions of an improved admissions scene.
[03:16] - Reflecting on the evolution of early decision strategies.
[04:49] - How large universities and early action plans are complicating the admissions narrative.
[06:19] - Unraveling the strategy game behind early admissions.
[09:04] - Discussing the broader implications of the admissions calendar shift.
[13:20] - Commercial dynamics of college admissions and the priority list of institutions.
[15:43] - The quest for diversity in admissions post-affirmative action.
[17:35] - Examining the emotional and mental toll of the admissions process.
[19:04] - How colleges desire for a vast applicant pool.
[21:56] - Encouraging students to broaden their college search.
[23:30] - Debunking the myth of the “perfect applicant”.
[26:05] - Exploring alternative narratives and pathways.
[26:59] - The contradiction of the college application.
[29:25] - Big fish, small pond.
[32:58] - The lottery winner’s pressure.
[37:38] - The cycle of the same few colleges.
[40:13] - Advice to kids in the search and application process.


Links & Resources:
•Jeff Selingo’s past guest episode on The Self Driven Child: Episode 4: Who Gets In and Why with Jeff Selingo
•Jeff Selingo’s Books: Dive deeper into the world of college admissions and student success with Jeff’s insightful publications. https://jeffselingo.com/
•Jeff Selingo’s New York Magazine Article: Inside the Craziest College-Admissions Season Ever

If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference.

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

Listen in as I chat with Journalist Lisa L. Lewis about the importance of sleep for teens. We explore why sleep matters for learning, behavior, and mental health. Lisa also shares her pivotal role in getting California to pass a landmark law on healthy school start times. We covered everything from the science of sleep to practical tips for ensuring our teens get the rest they need. You won't want to miss this episode if you're looking to understand the crucial role sleep plays in your teenager's life and well-being.

Lisa L. Lewis is a leading expert on adolescent sleep who played an instrumental role in California passing a first-of-its-kind state law regulating middle and high school start times. Her book "The Sleep-Deprived Teen" is described by Ariana Huffington as "a call to action" and by Daniel Pink as "an urgent and timely read."

Episode Highlights:
[01:19] The issue with sleep deprivation on children and teens.
[03:15] An op-ed Lisa wrote helped catalyze major statewide revolutionary change around school start times in California.
[04:57] Lisa’s personal experience with her child in school starting very early in the morning.
[05:33] Lisa put on her Journalism hat and researched other schools and the research on sleep deprivation.
[12:26] Lisa highlights how being sleep deprived makes learning far more difficult across all stages.
[18:17] Beyond duration, irregular sleep seriously sabotages academic performance too.
[20:39] Lack of sleep eats away at teens' emotional resilience, exacerbating conditions like anxiety.
[25:26] Exploring the challenges and solutions for changing school start times to benefit teen sleep.
[30:43] Coordinated statewide change helps bypass complications related to sports scheduling across districts.
[37:40] One remarkable example: a Florida school saw disciplinary issues, absentee rates and more improve after start times shifted later.
[47:14] The importance of making sleep a family priority for both teens and parents.

Links & Resources:
•"The Sleep-Deprived Teen" by Lisa L. Lewis: https://www.lisallewis.com/book
•The Self-Driven Child by Bill Stixrud and Ned Johnson
•What Do You Say? by Bill Stixrud and Ned Johnson

If this episode has struck a chord with you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. Here's to growing, learning, and thriving as adults in this wild world. Until next time!

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

In this episode, I chat with NPR reporter Michaeleen Doucleff about her New York Times bestseller, Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans.

We discuss what Michaeleen learned by taking her three-year-old daughter to learn parenting strategies from three indigenous communities: the Maya in Yucatán, the Inuit above the Arctic Circle, and the Hadzabe in Tanzania. She talks about finding parenting relationships based on cooperation rather than control, trust instead of fear, and personalized guidance rather than standardized expectations.

Episode Highlights:
[00:37] Introduction of Dr. Michaeleen Doucleff and her book, "Hunter Gatherer Parent."
[01:53] Michaeleen's journey as a global health correspondent for NPR.
[06:34] Exploration of parenting practices in various cultures.
[10:11] Insights into the Maya community's approach to raising helpful children.
[19:29] Michaeleen's personal experiences implementing these parenting techniques with her daughter.
[30:39] Discussion on motivation and collaboration in parenting.
[44:13] The impact of emotional regulation strategies from different cultures.
[57:18] Addressing criticisms and the universality of these parenting methods.

Links & Resources:
•Hunt, Gather, Parent by Michaeleen Doucleff
•The Self-Driven Child by Bill Stixrud and Ned Johnson
•What Do You Say? by Bill Stixrud and Ned Johnson

If this episode has struck a chord with you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. Here's to growing, learning, and thriving as adults in this wild world. Until next time!

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

In this episode, I have a great conversation with my co-author and friend Dr. Bill Stixrud about motivation and change, especially as we start a new year. We discuss the difference between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation and how to help kids find their own internal drive.

Dr. Bill Stixrud is a clinical neuropsychologist and author. We have co-authored two books together - The Self-Driven Child and What Do You Say? He brings a wealth of knowledge about the adolescent brain and supporting kids' development.

Episode Highlights:
[02:18] - Sharing my own New Year's resolutions as an example.
[05:03] - Explaining intrinsic vs extrinsic motivation.
[06:16] - Discussing natural consequences using a story about my tractor.
[09:39] - Connecting coping skills to motivation and change.
[11:27] - Talking about the ambivalence people feel around change.
[14:51] - Sharing a story about motivational interviewing and drug use.
[20:32] - Emphasizing you can't force someone to change.
[26:22] - Offering advice for parents who want to reset their approach.
[30:14] - Laughing about a story from our new book.
[33:51] - Wishing everyone a happy new year!

Links & Resources:
•The Self-Driven Child by Bill Stixrud and Ned Johnson
•What Do You Say? by Bill Stixrud and Ned Johnson

If this episode has struck a chord with you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. Here's to growing, learning, and thriving as adults in this wild world. Until next time!

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

I have spent over 25 years talking with parents about supporting their kids' education and wellbeing. After a turbulent few years dealing with the pandemic, I offer compassionate reflections on what I’ve learned about helping kids heal up before catching up academically.

Episode Highlights:
[02:22] - Kids tend to heal up before they catch up academically after disruptions like COVID.
[05:11] - Focus on balancing healthy inflows and outflows of stress for families.
[07:33] - Importance of parents being a non-anxious presence for kids.
[09:44] - Let kids solve their own problems; don't take over.
[12:11] - Anecdote about letting his son handle his own last-minute paper crunch.
[15:55] - Excelling in college after years of school struggles.
[19:22] - Kids want to do well even if they seem resistant.
[21:33] - Changing the energy from pressure to support with a struggling student.
[25:44] - Taking the long view and having confidence in kids.
[27:11] - Things can get better even after really tough years.

If this episode has struck a chord with you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. Here's to growing, learning, and thriving as adults in this wild world. Until next time!

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

In today’s episode, I dig into the art of adulting with the phenomenal Julie Lythcott-Haims. Julie is not just a former Stanford Dean and a New York Times bestselling author; she's a beacon of wisdom for the youth and an advocate for the exhilarating journey of self-reliance. Tune in as we unravel the complexities of adult life, discuss the power of human connection, and explore the intricacies of finding your 'why'. deliciousness of adulting!

Timeline Summary:

[00:00] - Julie opens up about the terror and exhilaration of stepping into adulthood and the deliciousness of being in charge of your own life.

[02:46] - A warm welcome to Julie, as she joins the podcast, bringing her insights on the challenges of adulting in today’s world.

[03:10] - Julie discusses her motivations for writing her latest book and reflects on her role as a guiding dean to the younger generation.

[05:59] - The struggle and triumph of finding a voice that resonates with young adults.

[10:27] - Unpacking the concept of adulting.

[17:23] - The necessity of stepping out of your comfort zone to truly engage with life and develop resilience.

[20:13] - The courage to be transparent and the power of sharing vulnerabilities.

[30:46] - Julie's discussion with Irshad Manji about the moral courage in conversations and the power of listening.

[37:47] - The deliberate inclusion of diverse voices and experiences to reflect the vast tapestry of human life.

[43:36] - The significance of mentors and the impact of one caring adult in a young person's life.

Links & Resources:

- Julie Lythcott-Haims' TED Talk: ted.com/talks/julie_lythcott_haims_how_to_raise_successful_kids_without_over_parenting
- Books:
- "How to Raise an Adult"
- "Real American"
- "Your Turn: How to Be an Adult"

If this episode has struck a chord with you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference. Here's to growing, learning, and thriving as adults in this wild world. Until next time!

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

This Thanksgiving episode tackles the inevitable family drama that comes with the holiday. I sat down with parenting experts Phyllis L. Fagell and Dr. Robyn Silverman to get their tips for navigating tricky conversations and situations with family members. We covered how to set expectations beforehand, validate kids' feelings without agreeing, use humor to defuse tense moments, and provide coping tools for when things go off the rails. The goal is to make the holiday more enjoyable for everyone - kids and adults alike! Tune in for practical strategies to make this Thanksgiving drama-free.

I was joined by two of my favorite parenting experts:

· Phyllis L. Fagell, school counselor and author of “Middle School Superpowers: Raising Resilient Tweens in Turbulent Times”.

· Dr. Robyn Silverman, child and teen development specialist and author of “How to Talk to Kids about Anything: Tips, Scripts, Stories, and Steps to Make Even the Toughest Conversations Easier”.

Timeline Summary:

[02:00] How to set expectations with family beforehand.

[03:57] Understanding kids' sensitivity around changes in their appearance.

[06:09] Making sure adults are aware of their own triggers.

[09:36] Giving kids an “out” if conversations get uncomfortable.

[12:18] Redirecting family away from constant questions about school.

[14:06] Using humor and screens to diffuse tense moments.

[18:08] Coaching kids on sharing funny videos/memes.

[19:29] Helping kids not feel “on the spot” in conversations.

[22:10] Getting to know grandparents as real people, not just authority figures.

[23:08] Alternatives to repetitive questions about school.

[27:25] Validating kids' feelings when things go wrong.

[31:53] Agreeing on facts versus feelings.

[33:07] Using different coping mechanisms based on the child.

[35:05] Having distractions/diversions ready when things go downhill.

[35:50] Importance of food and blood sugar levels.

Links & Resources:

· Washington Post Article: Getting silly with your kids is vital. Here’s how to get play into your day.

· Phyllis L. Fagell: https://phyllisfagell.com/

· Dr. Robyn Silverman:

o Website: https://www.drrobynsilverman.com

o Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/DrRobynSilverman/

I hope these practical tips help make Thanksgiving a little smoother for your family! If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to rate, follow, share, and review. Happy Thanksgiving!

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com