Funny Christmas

Dear Listener, Using letters, emails, tweets and telegrams I will show you how the things in your life that make you sad, low or anxious can soon appear trivial, insignificant and like a fish. In short, I will butter your parsnips. Life is hard. We are a bombarded generation: Facebook...

Tucker Max graduated with high honors from the University of Chicago in 1998 and received an academic scholarship to Duke Law School, where he graduated in 2001, despite the fact that he spent part of one semester--while still enrolled in classes--living in Cancun. He took these degrees and set...

Stevie loves to toot, chilly snowy farts. However, most people do not enjoy tooting like he does, and unfortunately for Stevie, his tooting makes him unable to work at all the different jobs that he tries. But maybe there is a way that Stevie can turn his tooting into his biggest advantage rather than a disadvantage? Find out whether Stevie is able to use his tooting skills to his advantage by listening along this classic holiday story for kids!

From the bestselling author of Everyone in My Family Has Killed Someone, a fiendishly fun locked room (train) murder mystery in the spirt of Murder on the Orient Express. With Ernest Cunningham, “Stevenson has brought a modern-day Poirot to the mystery scene”(Michelle Carpenter). When the...

A bestselling dystopian novel that tackles surveillance, privacy and the frightening intrusions of technology in our lives—a “compulsively readable parable for the 21st century” (Vanity Fair). When Mae Holland is hired to work for the Circle, the world’s most powerful internet company...

In The Nine Lives of Christmas by Sheila Roberts, two people are about to discover that when it comes to finding love, sometimes Christmas magic isn't enough...sometimes it takes a pesky orange cat named Ambrose. When a guy is in trouble, he starts making deals with his Creator...and Ambrose the...

Two hotel receptionists—and arch-rivals—find a collection of old wedding rings and compete to return them to their owners, discovering their own love story along the way. It’s the busiest season of the year, and Forest Manor Hotel is quite literally falling apart. So when Izzy and Lucas...

From the author of the Wall Street Journal bestseller Barking Up the Wrong Tree comes a cure-all for our increasing emotional distance and loneliness—a smart, surprising, and thoroughly entertaining guide to help build better friendships, reignite love, and get closer to others, whether...

Actor Kal Penn recounts why he rejected the advice of his aunties and guidance counselors and, instead of becoming a doctor or “something practical,” embarked on a surprising journey that has included confronting racism in Hollywood, meeting his future husband, and working in the Obama...

#1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER “Fans of John Grisham live for his legal thrillers, but now and then he serves up something unexpected. That’s exactly what he does, with great success, in Playing for Pizza.”—USA Today After providing what is arguably the worst single performance in the...

The perfect, feel-good holiday gift from W. Bruce Cameron, the #1 New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of the A Dog’s Purpose series The problems fracturing the Goss family as Christmas approaches are hardly unique, though perhaps they are handling them a little differently than...

The RuPaul's Drag Race legends, stars of UNHhhh, and expert biological women share the secrets of their feminine mystique in this satirical guide to beauty and homemaking. Drag superstars Trixie Mattel and Katya have long captivated fans with their stunning looks, onscreen chemistry, and...

Nora Ephron returns with her first audiobook since the astounding success of I Feel Bad About My Neck, taking a cool, hard, hilarious look at the past, the present, and the future, bemoaning the vicissitudes of modern life, and recalling with her signature clarity and wisdom everything she...

Welcome to the Staying Relevant audiobook, narrated by two best friends, Pete and Sam . . . contains swearing, adult themes and outrageous stories from life in the spotlight. If you think you know us already, you're wrong. You're gonna find out a hell of a lot about us. Probably more than you...

The Boys meets Assistant to the Villain in the electrifying, sharp, violent, and hilarious sequel to the highly acclaimed novel, Hench. Filled with a queer and neurodiverse cast, Villain asks the question: what happens when a diabolically brilliant henchperson looks back at their already storied...

"Cindy Kay masterfully narrates this unique audiobook, which combines a variety of genres to tell a moving story of self-acceptance and finding safety even in the bleakest of times." - AudioFile Magazine, Earphones Award review Good Omens meets The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet in Ryka...

From the muscle god who launched the YouTube channel Bro Science Life comes the only book that will teach you everything you need to know about getting swole. For years, bros, meatheads, and gym rats around the world have posed pressing questions: What can you bench? Can I skip leg day? What...

Hot on the heels of the #1 bestsellers The Onion's Our Dumb Century and Jon Stewart's America comes The Areas of My Expertise, the brilliant and uproarious #15 bestseller (i.e., a runaway phenomenon in its own right-no, seriously) - a lavish compendium of handy reference tables, fascinating...

Winner of the 2015 Grammy for Best Spoken Word Album Following up the phenomenal success of her headline-making New York Times bestseller I Hate Everyone...Starting With Me, the unstoppable Joan Rivers is at it again. When her daughter Melissa gives her a diary for Christmas, at first Joan is...

Can I get a “ramen” from the congregation?! Behold the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM), today’s fastest growing carbohydrate-based religion. According to church founder Bobby Henderson, the universe and all life within it were created by a mystical and divine being: the Flying...