Satire Comedy

Someone wants to murder Princess Melilot. This is sadly normal. Melilot is sick of being ordered to go on dangerous quests by her domineering stepmother. Especially since she always winds up needing to be rescued by her more magically talented stepsisters. And now, she's been commanded to marry a king she’s never met. When hideous spider-wolves attack her on the journey to meet her husband-to-be, she is once again rescued—but this time, by twelve eerily similar-looking masked huntsmen.

Many view "hitting rock bottom" as a foundation on which to rebuild one's life, a place from which one can only ascend. Gamers know to search for a secret door leading down to the sewer.

Cats are skilled manipulators who can talk you into just about anything without a single word. They can get you to drop whatever you're doing and play with them. They can make you serve their dinner way ahead of schedule. They can get you to sit down right this instant and provide a lap. On the other hand, try getting a cat to do what you want.... While it's hard, persuading a cat is possible. And after that, persuading humans becomes a breeze, and that is what you will learn in this audiobook.

Summer 1977. The Blyton Summer Detective Club (of Blyton Hills, a small mining town in Oregon's Zoinx River Valley) solved their final mystery and unmasked the elusive Sleepy Lake monster - another low-life fortune hunter trying to get his dirty hands on the legendary riches hidden in Deboën Mansion. And he would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for those meddling kids.

Barbara Lee Handbook (pronounced “Hanbok”), whom fans will know as Barbie Moran, the ‘80s bombshell and star of the cult sci-fi film Weird Menace, sits down with Director Toner Low to discuss the making of the classic film - set on a distant planet, featuring mutant attackers, cyber ladies of the 34th century, and no shortage of warring spaceships - for the Blu-ray edition, in this absurdly funny and poignant meditation on art, legacy, and our ambivalence about the life choices that define us.

Get ready for a hostile takeover of epic proportions. In BuyMort: Bull Market Mayhem, the end isn't nigh—it's been leveraged, securitized, and is ready to liquidate. Say your prayers and check your credit score because when the celestial ledger closes, you'll want to make sure your cosmic assets are diversified.

Meet Rabo Karabekian, a moderately successful surrealist painter who we meet late in life and see struggling (like all of Vonnegut's key characters) with the dregs of unresolved pain and the consequences of brutality. Loosely based on the legend of Bluebeard (best realized in Bela Bartok's one-act opera), the novel follows Karabekian through the last events in his life that is heavy with women, painting, artistic ambition, artistic fraudulence, and as of yet unknown consequence.

People pass the word only to those they trust most: Adjustment Day is coming. They've been reading a mysterious blue-black book and memorizing its directives. They are ready for the reckoning.

No matter what you heard or thought about the movie version of Strip Tease, forget it. Film simply can’t catch the layers of humor, satire, and imagination that Pulitzer Prize-winning author Carl Hiaasen creates in each of his novels.

This novel by Carl Hiaasen, author of Tourist Season and Native Tongue, begins as most thrillers do, with a killing. But this is no everyday, hum-drum, garden variety killing. Our hero, Nick Stranahan, a 42-year-old private investigator who has killed five men and been married five times, skewers his attacker's aorta with the razor-sharp bill of a stuffed marlin.

In a small, tidy apartment on the outskirts of the frenzied metropolis of Seoul lives Kim Jiyoung. A 30-something-year-old “millennial everywoman”, she has recently left her white-collar desk job - in order to care for her newborn daughter full-time - as so many Korean women are expected to do. But she quickly begins to exhibit strange symptoms that alarm her husband, parents, and in-laws: Jiyoung impersonates the voices of other women - alive and even dead, both known and unknown to her.

Entrusted with the lives of Jesus Christ's top servicemen, YouTube superstars Matt Watson and Ryan Magee must travel to the farthest reaches of the earth and terminate public enemy number one: Osama bin Laden. Discovering along their journey that things aren't always so easy for two incredibly rich and handsome celebrities, the dynamic duo is put through the ultimate trial of courage, patriotism, and friendship.

I played all those cool video games. I watched all those movies. I even read the books. In most of 'em, the hero shoots the bad guys, drives a sweet car, never gets hungry, and always seems to get laid by the end. Yeah. Whatever. I gotta be straight with you about why I wrote this journal, and it comes down to one thing, the apocalypse kinda sucks. It doesn’t meet my expectations at all.

Set in the 26th century A.D., Yevgeny Zamyatin's masterpiece describes life under the regimented totalitarian society of OneState, ruled over by the all-powerful "Benefactor." Recognized as the inspiration for George Orwell's 1984, We is the archetype of the modern dystopia, or anti-Utopia: a great prose poem detailing the fate that might befall us all if we surrender our individual selves to some collective dream of technology and fail in the vigilance that is the price of freedom.

What’s in a name? A lot. The name Tinaca, for example, has been passed down in the Jones family for generations of women. In fact, the Joneses name a Tinaca every other generation, to let the name breathe a little. To let each Tinaca shine. And shine is exactly what Tinaca Jones intends to do.

A man with a borrowed name steps from a flashy red sports car—also borrowed—onto the estate of his youth. But all is not as it seems. There is a new family living in the drafty old house: the Godleys, descendants of the late, world-famous scientist Adam Godley, whose theory of existence threw the universe into chaos. And this mystery man, who has just completed a prison sentence, feels as if time has stopped, or was torn, or was opened in new and strange ways. He must now vie with the idiosyncratic Godley family, and with a woman from his past who comes bearing an unusual request.

Palahniuk’s fashion-model protagonist has it all - boyfriend, career, loyal best friend - until an accident destroys her face, her ability to speak, and her self-esteem. Enter Brandy Alexander, Queen Supreme, one operation away from becoming a bona fide woman.

In this darkly comic novel, a group of women inhabits a world of constant surveillance, where informants lurk in the flower beds and false reports fly. Conspiracies abound in a community that normalizes paranoia and suspicion. Some try to flee - whether to a mysterious gambling bordello or to ancestral homes that can be reached only underground through muddy caves, sewers, and tunnels. Others seek out the refuge of Nest County, where traditional Chinese herbal medicines can reshape or psychologically transport the self. Each life is circumscribed by secrets and transcendent delusions.

Audio is a unique medium. It invites listeners to become a part of the process, to interpret what they hear, however they'd like; whereas motion pictures leave no such room for input. With the completion of this book, it dawned on me that, as an actor by trade, I could play the part; and I'm knee-deep in actor pals - why not record the book like a radio play? So that's exactly what happened. I rounded up an excellent troupe of thespians, from both Los Angeles and my home state of Oregon, and we recorded what was to become this epic listen for you to hear!

God Is Disappointed in You is for people who would like to read the Bible...if it would just cut to the chase. Stripped of its arcane language and interminable passages, every book of the Bible is condensed down to its core message, in no more than a few pages each. Written by Mark Russell with cartoons by New Yorker cartoonist Shannon Wheeler, God Is Disappointed in You is a frequently hilarious, often shocking, but always accurate retelling of the Bible, including the parts selectively left out by Sunday School teachers.