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Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist

How to End the Drama and Get On with Life

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Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist

Auteur(s): Margalis Fjelstad
Narrateur(s): Senn Annis
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À propos de cet audio

Bloomsbury presents Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist by Margalis Fjelstad, read by Senn Annis.

People with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorders have a serious mental illness that primarily affects their intimate, personal, and family relationships. Often they appear to be normally functioning at work and in public interactions, and Narcissists may even be highly effective, in the short term, in some work or social situations. However, in intimate relationships, they can be emotional, aggressive, demeaning, illogical, paranoid, accusing, and controlling—in the extreme. Their ability to function normally or pleasantly can suddenly change in an instant, like flipping a switch. These negative behaviors don’t happen once in a while, they happen almost continuously in their intimate relationships and most often, and especially with their Caretaker family member.

Here, Margalis Fjelstad describes how people get into a Caretaker role with a Borderline or Narcissist, and how they can get out. Caretakers give up their sense of self to become who and what the Borderline or Narcissist needs them to be. This compromises the Caretaker’s self-esteem, distorts their thinking processes, and locks them into a Victim-Persecutor-Rescuer pattern with the Borderline or Narcissist. The book looks at the underlying rules and expectations in these relationships and shows Caretaker’s how to move themselves out of these rigid interactions and into a healthier, more productive, and positive lifestyle—with or without the Borderline/Narcissistic partner or family member. It describes how to get out of destructive interactions with the Borderline or Narcissist and how to take new, more effective actions to focus on personal wants, needs, and life goals while allowing the Borderline or Narcissist to take care of themselves. It presents a realistic, yet compassionate, attitude toward the self-destructive nature of these relationships, and gives real life examples of how individuals have let go of their Caretaker behaviors with creative and effective solutions.©2022 Margalis Fjelstad (P)2022 Rowman & Littlefield
Développement personnel Psychologie Psychologie et santé mentale Relations Santé mentale
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real truth. real options. real down to earth advice and direction. I feel like a huge burden that's been lifted off my shoulders

really speaks to the caretaker or partner of a bpd

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I tried reading Stop Walking on Eggshells and came out of that read feeling worst than ever. thank goodness someone recommended this book. It actually focuses on the carer or someone with bpd/npd rather than dedicating the entire book on how to accept and validate the bpd/npd. I wanted a book that would make me feel seen, and this delivered. this book was a tough read, because it remains confrontational and does shed light on the choices and changes I can make to move forward...but it does actually speak to what it's like to care for someone with bpd/npd.

relieved, and feeling empowered to try new approaches to reclaim my peace. thank you!

Actually insightful

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Overall a great book! The narrator is a bit robotic, but I got used to their voice.

Great Information

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