
Ep. 6 - Fear is a Lack of Mental Discipline: The Fear-Faith Connection in Supporting Loved Ones with Addiction
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Ep. #6 - Fear is a Lack of Mental Discipline: The Fear-Faith Connection in Supporting Loved Ones with AddictionIn this "Get Unhooked Podcast" episode, Jason Coombs (Brick House Recovery) discusses Chapter 11 of "UNHOOKED" – the Hope chapter. He explores establishing boundaries, effective communication, and transforming struggles into service opportunities.
Key Moments
- 2:26 "Fear is lack of mental discipline" - Mental choices precede emotional responses
- 6:10 "Empathy isn't empathy without boundaries" - Proper boundaries bring hearts closer
- 8:03 Faith vs. fear - Challenges refine us "like a rolling stone down the river"
- 10:08 Service as path out of fear - Helping others alleviates obsessive thinking
- 13:03 "True recovery is identity change" not just abstinence
- 19:03 Two categories of fear - Not getting what we want; losing what we have
- 29:04 Testimony - Service transforms self-obsession into purpose
- 32:14 Recovery coach certification opportunities
Mental Discipline: Foundation for Change
Jason establishes that managing addiction – whether our own or supporting others – begins with mental choices, not emotional reactions. "Every day, what I have control over is how I choose to view any situation," he emphasizes.
Three Guiding Principles
- Boundaries enhance empathy – Referencing Brené Brown, Jason shows how boundaries actually bring hearts closer
- Faith as mental discipline – Contrasting faith (cultivated mindset) with fear (default state)
- Service as freedom – Serving others provides the fastest path out of fear
Identity Change: The "Sober Secret"
True recovery requires identity transformation beyond abstinence. "A lot of people can get sober, but the true recovery is identity change," Jason explains, sharing his transition from seeing himself as a failure to recognizing his qualification to help others.
Understanding this distinction helps family members better support the whole-person transformation essential for lasting change.
Understanding Fear
Jason identifies two core fear categories that drive anxiety around addiction:
- Fear of not getting what we want
- Fear of losing what we have
Service: The Antidote
Participants share how serving others transformed their journeys. One notes: "Serving with other struggling parents has made such a difference. All my things about myself get lost in being of service."
Actionable Takeaways
- Pause before responding emotionally
- Establish empathy-enhancing boundaries
- Identify your loved one's stage of change before communicating
- Distinguish between sobriety and recovery
- Find service opportunities to escape fear
- Join recovery communities for shared strength
Resources
- Get Unhooked podcast on major platforms
- "Unhooked" book (Audible, Amazon, Jason's website)
- Eight-week Get Unhooked family course
- Recovery coach certification paths
- Brick House Recovery services
Jason concludes with gratitude for the community, acknowledging that transformation occurs through connection with others and a higher power.
For more resources, visit Brick House Recovery or explore Jason's book UNHOOKED. For emergencies, call 911.
For more information check out brickhouserecovery.com