Case #0031 - Mel cannot think of a single sports movie plot to reference due to their brain being melted by work and insane shit happening in their personal life (not even surf’s up, the worlds best sports movie). Anti-counsel Ally dismisses the severity of Nodes. Judge Barbara Lynn reveals her chore song, and it’s NOT what you would expect. Angel of Death Ben Platt silently judges Mel through Zoom from behind Anti-Counsel Ally’s shoulder.

NOTE - To save Mel's ass, here are some relevant sports movies to back up her argument:

• sports movie where people go to jail or are in jail: The Longest Yard With adam sandler, Mystery Alaska, Cars, that part in Riverdale when Archie says “the epic highs and lows of high school football” while in a prison yard
• sports movies where the coach and the new talent don’t get along: Cars, Remember the Titans, Rudy, Surf's Up
• sports movies where someone gets sidelined by an injury: Rocky 2, The Blind Side, Million Dollar Baby, The Might Ducks, Surfs Up, The Rookie, The Natural, Friday Night Lights, Any Given Sunday, Sea Biscuit
• sports movies with dad propaganda: The Blind Side (actually, its mom propaganda), The Mighty Ducks, The Rookie, The Sandlot

Thank’s for showing up to jury duty! Court will be back in session at the end of September!

TW: Matthew morrison, getting waterboarded, kidnapping, Mel accidentally forgetting Bologna Barb’s singing, bullying, mention of suicide

Follow us on tumblr (https://raccooncourt.tumblr.com/) and instagram (@raccooncourtpod), or you can send a long form memo to our email (raccooncourt@gmail.com).

Album art by @sansh_pixel on Fiverr

Today’s podcast includes soundbites from Pitch Perfect (2012) and the TV shows Glee and Jessie. This is not my content, and I am utilizing it under fair use for comment and criticism.

APPENDIX

• the article Mel quoted
• our Letterboxd accounts (Mel)
• RACCOON COURT MERCH BABY (we now have unhinged bumper stickers)
• BL's plugs (going outside, Rose in Chains, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, a League of their Own, NADDPOD)
• Ally's plugs (Pentatonix, Benchwarmers, Duke's Pitchforks, Glee, Ben Platt)
• Mel's plugs (I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997, 2025), Audrey Hobert, Girl of Your Dreams)
• Aly and AJ playlist

Welcome back to Raccoon Court! After almost a full calendar year, we are back in the courtroom, but before we get into new cases, we have to lay some ground rules (which can be found here). Honorable Prosecuties, Judges, and Anti-counsels Ally, BL, Jess, and Ilsa join Mel for a reading and open comment session on the rules while updating the jury about shit they've been up to since last July.

Thank’s for showing up to jury duty! Court will be back in session at the end of July!

TW: tyranny, the state of the world, breakups, astronaut Katy Perry, religion, mormonism

NOTE: We joke a little bit about current affairs, fascism, and tyranny in this episode. Please note that this courtroom obviously condemns the many insane and illegal acts of hate currently executed by the US Government and the disregard for the people of Gaza. This court stands against hate, fascism, discrimination, and the blatant disregard for rules and regulations in the justice system, even though we allow for all manner of silliness and lies in our own court.

Follow us on tumblr (https://raccooncourt.tumblr.com/) and instagram (@raccooncourtpod), or you can send a long form memo to our email (raccooncourt@gmail.com).

Album art by @sansh_pixel on Fiverr

APPENDIX
- Jess's Music!
- The Raccoon Rules of Civil Fuckery
- our Letterboxd accounts (Mel, Jess, Ilsa)
- our goodreads accounts (Mel, Jess)
- RACCOON COURT MERCH BABY (we now have unhinged bumper stickers)
- Mormon YouTuber that Mel brought up but couldn't remember the name of
- Ilsa's plugs (Listening to music that is outside your comfort zone, making a ball of fuzz or doing a craft)
- Mel's plugs (Sophie Truax, Twisters, I Don't Understand You, Clown in a Cornfield, Hell of a Summer, One of Them Days, Freaky Tales, Street Signs by Ila Amiri, the MTA song)
- Jess's plugs (Fallen Leaves)
- BL's plugs (Going outside, Face Off)
- Ally's plugs (Overcompensating)

Case #0030 - Can you tell all three of the people on the podcast are reading the Feminine Mystique together for book club? Mel acts as the resident internet historian on grave robbing and John Green. Judge Prosecutie Jess teaches us about otter mating rituals. Judge Ilsa is very brave.

NOTE - the plot point about the gay boyfriend that Mel was hallucinating about is from Clueless, not 10 Things I Hate About You

Thank’s for showing up to jury duty! Court will be back in session at the end of August!

TW: trad wives, bullying, misogyny, revenge porn, possession of child pornography, pete wentz’s nudes, home wrecker Rory Gilmore, grooming, self-harm

Follow us on tumblr (https://raccooncourt.tumblr.com/) and instagram (@raccooncourtpod), or you can send a long form memo to our email (raccooncourt@gmail.com).

Album art by @sansh_pixel on Fiverr

Today’s podcast includes soundbites from 10 Things I Hate About You (1999) and "Ain't No Love in Oklahoma" by Luke Combs. This is not my content, and I am utilizing it under fair use for comment and criticism.

APPENDIX
- Jess's Music!
- our Letterboxd accounts (Mel, Jess, Ilsa)
- our goodreads accounts (Mel, Jess)
- RACCOON COURT MERCH BABY (we now have unhinged bumper stickers)
- Ilsa's plugs (Have a Nice Life, Locrian, Planning for Burial)
- Mel's plugs (Collective Rage, Sophie Truax, Fruits Basket 2019)
- Jess's plugs (My Lady Jane)
- the article Mel quoted ("Misogyny, Media, and Male Approval: The “I’m Not Like Other Girls” Phenomenon" by Sreesha Ghosh) seems to not exist because that website doesn't exist anymore??
- Mel's favorite Pick Me Girl Video Essays (1, 2)
- uncarly John Green Video