Humorous Fiction Family

Her body used to work perfectly. For years, she tallied her orgasms, maintained a Top Humps list, and rated men on whether they excited her more mentally or physically—all with the purpose of finding the ideal love match. Now, as she moves into her thirties and is settled down with Serious Boyfriend Number Three, she’s run into a problem. Sex hurts. She can’t get wet. Her vagina, which has never led her astray before, suddenly seems like it might be broken.

When her father loses his job, Ramona decides to help out. Maybe she could earn a million dollars making a TV commercial, or get her father to stop smoking to save money (and his lungs). She is full of ideas. Some work, some don't. But when her father says he wouldn't trade her for a million dollars, Ramona knows all is right in her world.

When Philip Digby first shows up on her doorstep, Zoe Webster is not impressed. He's rude and he treats her like a book he's already read and knows the ending to. But before she knows it, Digby - annoying, brilliant, and somehow...attractive? Digby - has dragged her into a series of hilarious and dangerous situations all related to an investigation into the kidnapping of a local teenage girl. A kidnapping that may be connected to the tragic disappearance of his own sister eight years ago.

The marshals are looking for the perfect girl to join a mother, father, and son on the run from the nation's most notorious criminals. After all, the bad guys are searching for a family with one kid, not two, and adding a streetwise girl who knows a little something about hiding things may be just what the marshals need. Nicki swears she can keep the Trevor family safe, but to do so she'll have to dodge hit men, cyberbullies, and the specter of standardized testing, all while maintaining her marshal-mandated B-minus average.

In their eighth adventure, sisters Sabrina and Daphne Grimm must face their gravest mission yet. The Everafter War is over, and the sisters find themselves trapped in the Book of Everafter—a place where fairy tale characters can affect their own destinies. While trying to save their baby brother, Sabrina and Daphne begin changing events in the story to suit their needs.

Following up on the classic children's novel The Saturdays, Elizabeth Enright continues the engaging tale of the Melendy family (Mona, Rush, Randy, Oliver, Father, and Cuffy, the housekeeper) and their move from an old brownstone in New York City to a charming house in the country. Called the Four-Story Mistake for its odd look and confused architectural history, the house offers the Melendys wonderful quirks and surprises.

Ramona's life changes the moment Howie Kemp's mysterious uncle arrives from Saudi Arabia. Howie and his sister, Willa Jean, talk only about Uncle Hobart. Ramona's mother makes secret phone calls and stops eating dessert, and Aunt Bea is hiding something, too. Whatever surprises are in store, Ramona is determined to be happy and helpful. Whether she's pleasant or pesty, brave or blunderful, she's always wonderful Ramona - forever!

Coop is cooking up another sure-misfire scheme (big surprise), and this time the comedy plays out from Sean’s point of view. What’s the new master plan? Making a cheapo horror movie guaranteed to make Coop, Sean, and Matt filthy rich! It’s a terrible idea, and Sean knows it. But he actually is desperate for cash - and for a way to wipe that big fat L off his girlfriend-less forehead. But when he agrees to write a script about the attack of zombie-vampire humanzees, he has no idea just how powerful a chick magnet this movie will be. Suddenly Sean is juggling not one but three interested ladies.

Carter Jones is astonished early one morning when he finds a real English butler, bowler hat and all, on the doorstep - one who stays to help the Jones family, which is a little bit broken. In addition to figuring out middle school, Carter has to adjust to the unwelcome presence of this new know-it-all adult in his life and navigate the butler's notions of decorum. And ultimately, when his burden of grief and anger from the past can no longer be ignored, Carter learns that a burden becomes lighter when it is shared.

Since returning from London, the three Incorrigible children and their plucky governess, Miss Penelope Lumley, have been exceedingly busy. Despite their wolfish upbringing, the children have taken up bird-watching, with no unfortunate consequences - yet. And a perplexing gift raises hard questions about how Penelope came to be left at the Swanburne Academy for Poor Bright Females and why her parents never bothered to return for her. But hers is not the only family mystery to solve....

It’s bad enough that Mom and Dad are going on a trip without Judy and Stink and leaving them in the care of Aunt Awful (er, Opal). Now two of Judy’s friends are going Splitsville, too! Just when it looks like her summer is going to be the boringest, snoringest ever, Judy concocts a THRILL-a-delic plan. Judy Moody and Frank Pearl dive headlong into nonstop action in pursuit of the Judy Moodiest summer ever! Based on a screenplay by Megan McDonald and Kathy Waugh, Judy Moody and the NOT Bummer Summer will take listeners on a totally awesome adventure – RARE!

Almost one year ago, Alice TodHunter Moon left her PathFinder village to become Apprentice to ExtraOrdinary Wizard Septimus Heap. Now, in faraway lands, the Castle is in peril. The brilliant blue stone is crumbling to dust, and both the witch Marisa and the wicked Red Queen have their eyes on the throne. But as Tod sets off on a hazardous journey to find a new Keystone, her life may be in the greatest danger of all. Can she save the Castle while evading the fate that befell her mother?

Of especially naughty children it is sometimes said, "They must have been raised by wolves." The Incorrigible children actually were. Turning sixteen is a bittersweet occasion for Miss Penelope Lumley: Her parents remain disappointingly absent, and her perfectly nice young playwright friend, Simon Harley-Dickinson, has not been heard from since he went to visit his ailing great-uncle Pudge in the old sailors' home in Brighton.

Four fantastic new stories about everyone’s favourite twins. There’s always double trouble when these two are about, so get ready for more mayhem as they look after the school hamster for half term, have a competition to build the best snowman, raise money with a yard sale and have a roller coaster of a time at the local theme park!

The Herdmans plus Halloween have always spelled disaster. Every year, these six kids, the worst in the history of Woodrow Wilson School and possibly even the world, wreak havoc on the whole town. They steal candy, spray-paint kids, and take anything that's not nailed down. Now the mayor has had it. He's decided to cancel Halloween. The Herdmans manage to turn the worst Halloween ever into the best Halloween ever in this uproarious sequel to The Best Christmas Pageant Ever.

One morning, Jessa-Lynn Morton walks into the family taxidermy shop to find that her father has committed suicide, right there on one of the metal tables. Shocked and grieving, Jessa steps up to manage the failing business, while the rest of the Morton family crumbles. Her mother starts sneaking into the shop to make aggressively lewd art with the taxidermied animals. Her brother Milo withdraws, struggling to function. And Brynn, Milo's wife - and the only person Jessa's ever been in love with - walks out without a word.

Julie thinks her new neighbors must be very scary because all the stuff being moved into their house is enormous. Then she meets David and finds out that he's just a normal, regular boy. But when David's father calls him for supper the sound makes Julie jump in the air, run in a circle three times, run home and lock herself in her room until it is time for breakfast the next day. Could David's father be a giant?

Liam is too big for his boots. And his football strip. And his school blazer. But being super-sized height-wise has its advantages: he's the only eleven-year-old to ever ride the G-force defying Cosmic rollercoaster - or be offered the chance to drive a Porsche. Long-legged Liam makes a giant leap for boy-kind by competing with a group of adults for the chance to go into space. Is Liam the best boy for the job? Sometimes being big isn't all about being a grown-up.

Ramona feels this is the awkward age - too little to stay by herself after school when her mother is at work, but too big to enjoy playing with pesty Willa Jean at her sitter's house. These days, all Ramona really wants is to twitch her nose and be her mother's little rabbit like she used to be. Can't she be her mother's little girl forever?

Ever since Grandma Lou gave her that squished penny, Judy can’t stop winning - at bowling, at spelling, at everything! For sure and absolute positive, she’ll ride that wave of good fortune all the way to the nation’s capital. Watch out, D.C. Here comes Judy Moody, the luckiest kid ever! Luckiest, that is, until her lucky penny has an unlucky accident. Suddenly it’s good-bye, Lucky Duck! Hello, C-A-L-A-M-I-T-Y! Has Judy’s luck gone down the toilet for good?