Teen Humor

Finding himself alone in a posh New York City hotel room for the night, Aidan does what any red-blooded 17-year-old would do - tries to hook up with someone new. But that lapse in judgement leads him to a room with a dead guy and a mysterious flash drive...two things that spark an epic case of mistaken identity that puts Aidan on the run - from the authorities, his friends, his family, the people who are out to kill him - and especially from his own troubled past.

Michael Carter is 12 years old. Right now, he and his fart brothers are in space, trying to save the president, and everything's going wrong. Every. Single. Thing. Larry is lost, but new unexpected allies are going to help the gang! Will they get rid of the gross zombies, once and for all? And the aliens? That’s a whole other story! They need to get rid of those, too.

When Mallory discovers that her boyfriend, Jeremy, is cheating on her with an online girlfriend, she swears off boys. She also swears off modern technology. Inspired by a list of goals her grandmother made in 1962, Mallory decides to "go vintage" and return to a simpler time (when boyfriends couldn't cheat on you online). She sets out to complete grandma's list: Run for pep club secretary, host a dinner party, sew a homecoming dress, find a steady, do something dangerous.

It's a question as old as time itself: which is better, the zombie or the unicorn? In this anthology, edited by Holly Black and Justine Larbalestier (unicorn and zombie, respectively), strong arguments are made for both sides in the form of short stories. Half of the stories portray the strengths - for good and evil - of unicorns and half show the good (and really, really bad-ass) side of zombies.

It's 1991, and Tara Maureen Murphy is finally on top. A frightening cross between Regina George and Tracy Flick, Tara Maureen Murphy is any high school's worst nightmare. She's a senior, poised to star as Sandy in South High's production of Grease. Cinching the role is just one teensy step in Tara's plot to get out of her hometown and become the Broadway starlet she was born to be. It gets tricky with the arrival of freshman Matthew Bloom, whose dazzling audition for the role of Danny Zuko turns Tara's world upside down.

Erin Craig "delivers" on a story about a new girl in town and the cute pizza delivery boy, Auriane Desombre captures our hearts with teens communicating through window signs, and Bill Konigsberg takes us along on daily walks with every step bringing us closer to love. There's flirting and romance from Rachael Lippincott, a tale of a determined girl with a mask-making business from Erin Hahn, and a music-inspired love connection from Sajni Patel. Brittney Morris turns enemies to lovers with the help of a balcony herb garden.

James Patterson's hilarious story of perseverance and courage shows everyone's favorite troublemaker, Rafe Khatchadorian, the star of the Middle School series, learning to become a leader at long last. After a rough summer, Rafe is heading back to the dreaded Hills Village Middle School, the site of the very worst years of his life. And as if that's not bad enough, he's learned that he's going to be held back a year unless he can prove himself on an outdoor survival excursion.

Rosa and Eddie are among hundreds of teens applying to NASA's mysterious Interworlds Agency. They're not exactly sure what the top-secret program entails, but they know they want in. Even if they are selected, they have no idea what lies in store. But first they have to make it through round after round of crazy-competitive testing. And then something happens that even NASA's scientists couldn't predict....

Now that the infuriating and irresistible Philip Digby has left town for a lead on his sister who disappeared years ago, Zoe Webster is looking forward to a quiet spring semester. She's dating a cute quarterback, hanging out with new friends, and enjoying being "a normal". Which is of course when Digby comes back. He needs Zoe's help, and not just to find his sister.

What the world needs now is an audio book narrated by a snarky cat named Skitters. When this over-sized sack of stripes finds himself upgraded from life in a parking garage to a mansion in Utah, all seems to be well. Then Skitters takes up with Harriet, a fiery feline who belongs to a little girl living in a polygamist cult.

Steve Stevenson is a jerk. That might not be a cool thing to say about someone with cancer, but it’s true. Yeah, he throws legendary parties and is the most popular guy in school, but he also loves humiliating pranks and Cardi B, and he doesn’t recycle. Worst of all, he’s dating Kaia - the girl of nice guy Cam’s dreams. But when a desperate Kaia asks Cam to help her raise money to pay for Steve’s experimental treatment, Cam offers to organize the biggest, most viral fundraising campaign.

I just returned from the mall after school shopping with my soon-to-be sophomore and her friend. I now understand why fathers opt to go camping, roll around in elk urine, and shit in a hole rather than go to the mall three days before school starts. As if the crowds weren’t bad enough, my girl decided to wear a flannel that hung lower than her shorts, making it appear that she was walking around naked from the waist down. She was flocked by sales people, who, I am sure, were calculating their commissions in their heads. I mean, why not?

Dabei hätten es so schöne Ferien werden können: Anne und Georg sind bei ihrer Tante zu Besuch und Richard und Julius ganz in der Nähe in einem Landschulheim untergebracht. Da werden Richard und Julius auf einmal verdächtigt, im Schullandheim gestohlen zu haben. Die „Fünf Freunde“ machen sich auf die Suche nach den wahren Tätern und enttarnen mit Hilfe der Tante eine Fälscherbande, die im Schullandheim ihr Unwesen treibt.

With over 3,000 jokes, this audiobook is a great addition to any family library and is sure to provide listeners of all ages with limitless pleasure. Explore the world of timeless dad jokes that are so funny they make you grin, sharp one-liners that will surprise you, smart puns that play on words in the funniest ways, and short humorous stories that will make you laugh. There's something in this collection for every age group to appreciate, be they young, old, or somewhere in between.

Merit Cravan refused to fulfill her obligation to marry a prince, leading to a fairy godling's curse. She will be forced to live as a beast forever, unless she agrees to marry a man of her mother's choosing before her 18th birthday. Tevin Dumont has always been a pawn in his family's cons. The prettiest boy in a big family, his job is to tempt naïve rich girls to abandon their engagements, unless their parents agree to pay him off. But after his mother runs afoul of the beast, she decides to trade Tevin for her own freedom.

In Banshee, Samantha Baxter - wife, mother, poetry professor - learns she has breast cancer and then ruins her own life. Tumbling through a catastrophic midlife crisis, she gives herself permission to partake in behaviors she's observed in her male colleagues, including having an affair with a student her daughter's age, ranting at board meetings, and telling her poetry students what she really thinks of their work. Underneath biting, witty narration lurks a childish, confused, and unrealized adult woman hell-bent on destroying her relationships and professional life.

To become a Dark Lord is no easy thing. The simple ambition to hold dominion over the world and bend all to your will sounds straightforward, but it's not. There are armies to raise, fortresses to build, heroes to defeat, and battles to be fought. After many spectacular failures, Evil decided to lend more than inspiration to these would-be tyrants. He wrote an easy-to-follow Dark Lord's Handbook. And yet the next Dark Lord that came along screwed up like all the others.

Sound the Cosmic Horn for best-selling author Louise Rennison’s ninth book of the confessions of crazy but loveable teenager Georgia Nicolson!Now that Georgia has finally won over gorgey Masimo, the Italian Stallion, her old friend and lip-nibbling partner Dave the Laugh has popped up again. Will Georgia go to Pizza-a-gogo land to visit dreamy Masimo? Or could her perfect boy be closer than she thinks. A Sex Kitty’s life is never simple…More hilarious confessions.

What if you aren't the Chosen One? The one who's supposed to fight the zombies or the soul-eating ghosts or whatever the heck this new thing is with the blue lights and the death? What if you're like Mikey? Who just wants to graduate and go to prom and maybe finally work up the courage to ask Henna out before someone goes and blows up the high school. Again.

What if a zombie apocalypse or a robot uprising threatened the nation, and you had the power to recruit some of the nation's finest presidents to help save the day? By studying the most successful squads in history, Daniel O'Brien has identified the perfect ingredients for a victorious team. Which president would you choose for: the Brain, the Brawn, the Moral Compass, the Loose Cannon, and the Roosevelt?