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Publisher's Summary

New York Times best seller

Reese’s Book Club x Hello Sunshine book pick.

From a leading voice on racial justice, an eye-opening account of growing up Black, Christian, and female that exposes how White America’s love affair with “diversity” so often falls short of its ideals. 

“Austin Channing Brown introduces herself as a master memoirist. This book will break open hearts and minds.” (Glennon Doyle, number one New York Times best-selling author of Untamed)

Austin Channing Brown's first encounter with a racialized America came at age seven, when she discovered her parents named her Austin to deceive future employers into thinking she was a White man. Growing up in majority-White schools and churches, Austin writes, "I had to learn what it means to love blackness", a journey that led to a lifetime spent navigating America's racial divide as a writer, speaker, and expert helping organizations practice genuine inclusion.

In a time when nearly every institution (schools, churches, universities, businesses) claims to value diversity in its mission statement, Austin writes in breathtaking detail about her journey to self-worth and the pitfalls that kill our attempts at racial justice. Her stories bear witness to the complexity of America's social fabric - from Black Cleveland neighborhoods to private schools in the middle-class suburbs, from prison walls to the boardrooms at majority-White organizations. For listeners who have engaged with America's legacy on race through the writing of Ta-Nehisi Coates and Michael Eric Dyson, I'm Still Here is an illuminating look at how White, middle-class Evangelicalism has participated in an era of rising racial hostility, inviting the listener to confront apathy, recognize God's ongoing work in the world, and discover how Blackness - if we let it - can save us all.

©2018 Austin Channing Brown (P)2018 Random House Audio

What the critics say

“Powerful...Brown calls on readers to live their professed ideals rather than simply state them.” (Publishers Weekly)

"What a stunning debut from a seasoned racial justice leader. Austin does double duty by fiercely affirming blackness while simultaneously unveiling and demystifying the subtle effects of white supremacy among Christians. I trust Austin, I listen to Austin and I learn from Austin. I hope you will too." (Christena Cleveland, professor at Duke University and author of Disunity in Christ)

"The movement toward diversity and forgiveness, [Brown] points out, too often involves white people seeking credit for recognizing the crimes of the past even as they do nothing to fix things today, and black people being required to provide endless absolution and information while calmly enduring dignity-eroding and rage-inducing injustices." (Library Journal)

"Brown passionately rejects facile reliance on 'hope', stating that 'in order for me to stay in this work, hope must die' and '[t]he death of hope gives way to a sadness that heals, to anger that inspires, to a wisdom that empowers me.' An eloquent argument for meaningful reconciliation focused on racial injustice rather than white feelings." (Booklist

What listeners say about I'm Still Here

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Beautiful story telling

Great stories hammering home examples to sum up a profound message and one audio book I've listened to more than once to capt additional nuggets of wisdom from one woman's experience.

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Ok

Overall it was good to hear some perspective on what life can be like for black people. although there were some things I didn't agree on, but I will not get into that.

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Profound read!

I had "I'm Still Here" on my reading list since the beginning of Black Summer and even more so after I heard Austin Channing Brown on Brené Brown's podcast, Unlocking Us. For any white person wanting to be an ally and asking for an introduction to the lived experience of a BIPOC individual in America, specifically that of a black woman.
It's thoughtful and heartbreakingly vulnerable at times. I left the book profoundly changed, chastened and inspired that white people can work harder for our BIPOC neighbours, friends, community members. It will make for a better society.

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book club pick

too much god talk in this book for me, but I appreciated the navigating white nonprofit stories.

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excellent

such an amazing book to listen to. I cried throughout and loved her sharing her personal experiences.

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thank you for writing this!

I ended up stopping a few of my other audio books to listen to this one. Austin is articulate and generous in sharing her experiences. More than once her voice brought me to tears. I love the honesty of saying "nope, it's not good enough-- do better." Thanks for being unapologetically fabulous.

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Standing in the Substance of Hope.

Like Esther, you were made for a time like this. Thanks for giving me perspective and HOPE.

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this was fantastic

this was a really great listen and will be reccomended to everyone I know. very powerful coming directly from the author

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A vulnerable story with a valuable perspective

I appreciated the author’s vulnerability in sharing her experiences and perspectives as a black woman. It made the book even better to have it read by the author herself. I laughed and cried with her. I think hearing the author’s perspective will help me as a white woman be more aware of what the people of colour in my life may be feeling or experiencing and to listen better.

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Excellent

Well written, spoken and very insightful. I highly recommend this to everyone. Austin is very captivating.

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  • Adam Shields
  • 2018-05-16

A Black woman in a middle class White America

A little over a week ago I sat down with a list of the books I had read since the start of 2017 and analyzed the authors. I looked at how many were White, how many were women, how many were fiction versus non-fiction. What I discovered when I completed this quick exercise was that I read just over 60% non-fiction. Although the authors of the fiction I read was was roughly evenly split between men and women authors, my non-fiction was five times more likely to be male authors as female. And my non-fiction was three times more likely to be White than non-White authors. Because of my bias toward non-fiction, I read mostly White males.

This exercise was not about meeting a quota, but about exploring what as a reader I am consuming. How much do I, when not paying attention, default to reading the voices of White males (a lot). What do I need to do to make sure I am not internalizing the bias of my reading choices? With that information, I know that I need to make sure I am intentionally picking up more books written by minorities, especially women.

I picked up I’m Still Here: Black Dignity in a World Made for Whiteness yesterday, when it came out, in part because of my exercise not hearing minority, especially female minority authors. I’m Still Here is brief, just over 3 hours in audiobook. It is mostly memoir. Austin Channing Brown opens with a story about how her name (one that is associated mostly with White Males) was chosen intentionally to get her in the door for interviews. She grew up in mostly White neighborhoods and going to mostly White schools. It wasn’t until college that she had her first Black teacher. But the saturation in White culture did not change her skin color or how she was perceived by those that were going to judge her because of her gender or skin.

It appears to me that I’m Still Here is written primarily for Black women, but with the intention to be overheard by others. She celebrates her blackness because that is how God created her. And she celebrates the comfort of the Black church in the reality of the difficulties of the world. It tells about the emotional baggage that has been heaped upon her as a professional woman working mostly in Christian non-profits to do the work of making Whites feel good about how much progress has been made in racial issues or to spoon feed them history about racism in the US.

Part of her work has been directly around diversity and racial awareness. So she has both informal and formal background in what it means to be a Black Woman in a White Christian world. She has led diversity trainings and facilitated White youth groups coming into urban neighborhoods for awareness building. She has been asked to understand plenty without most Whites being willing to understand even a portion.

I am very glad that the end of the book spoke directly about racial reconciliation. She diagnoses the problem well,

“...reconciliation is not about white feelings. It’s about diverting power and attention to the oppressed, toward the powerless. It’s not enough to dabble at diversity and inclusion while leaving the existing authority structure in place. Reconciliation demands more."

When I criticized John Perkins’ recent book One Blood, it wasn’t that I didn’t agree with his basic point, that we as Christians are in fact one blood and that racial reconciliation is very important. I disagreed with the tone and focus of the book because it was not hard enough on Whites. And Perkins seem to place, if not equal, at least significant, responsibility on minority Christians for their part in making racial reconciliation work within the church. Austin Channing Brown is not playing around with that type of equivocation. Racism is the result of White’s prejudice and power, and while many minorities want to work to end racism, the reality is that they have mostly been doing the work unassisted. Racism is ultimately a White problem as James Baldwin has said. But one where the largest payment for the problem is borne by those that are not White.

I’m Still Here is one of the best examples of why, even though I think that White authors need to step up and talk about race and prejudice and racism and history, we cannot stop listening to people of color, especially women, as they tell us their reality.

(I also appreciate that the publisher let her read her own book. Books should be, whenever possible, narrated by their own author.)

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  • Sarah Joslyn
  • 2018-05-22

A must read for “good” white people

This book will break your heart if you haven’t been broken by racial injustice already and it will break it again if you have. This is essential reading for all of us well-meaning “good” white people.

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  • Bridget Blinn-Spears
  • 2018-05-19

Read this. Or listen to it.

My white ears will need to consider this book - which is not for me but has so much to teach me - over and over again.

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  • HALEY D.
  • 2020-06-03

:/

I was hoping to learn from this book. I walked away having heard a very bitter story and a lot of “ exhausting white people “ stories. That was the narrative . I wanted to learn from her and be able to apply. Very disappointing.

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  • Aaron
  • 2018-06-06

Racism is terrible. Now what?

Brown makes the omnipresent weight of racism crystal clear. But if you already thought racism is a bad and common thing (or if you didn’t), the book gives no idea what you can do to address it, help minorities, or work against it effectively - personally or societally.

14 people found this helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 2018-05-21

Read this book!!

I really enjoyed this book. It’s honest, brave, direct, captivating. It was a gift to hear the novel read by the author as well. Please read this book!!!

14 people found this helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 2021-04-07

4 hours of bashing white people

I was hoping to gain an understanding for a different perspective from listening to this book. I came with an open mind and an interested heart. However, this whole book is built upon overgeneralizations about an entire race of people. At every turn the whites are conspiring and destroying black culture. Every single negative experience the author has with a white person is contextualized into something having to do with racism. Just absolutely over the top. No new ideas and no new insights. Just bashing on white people for 4 hrs and fostering a victim mentality. Really don't recommend.

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  • Greg Foster
  • 2018-05-24

Amazing

I loved every bit of this book. Very profound and extremely brutally honest in a very caring way with a purpose of shedding light on very relevant issues. I understand where the author is coming from as far as being alienated for being different or just flat out being yourself that with being amongst your own as well as other ethnicities. So proud to say I have known Mrs. Austin Channing Brown. One thing I must say is that I am extremely jealous to say I never took one of Dr. Sims courses.

8 people found this helpful

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  • JTT
  • 2018-05-22

Thereputic

As I listened to this book on my drive home from Michigan and again in the grocery store at Meijer and took in the words of this dear sister, I feel so seen. My hurts have been acknowledged, my pain experienced, my joy lifted up. I am thankful for the labor of love this book has been. And for the way the Lord has used it to bring comfort to my soul.

8 people found this helpful

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  • Nicole
  • 2018-05-16

Seminal work

This should be required reading for anyone doing work in racial justice. If you are white and you ever wondered what your non-white coworker was experiencing - Austin Channing Brown lays it bare. Hearing her truth, seeing her experience, being gifted her thoughts is a deep honor. Hearing her truth has given words to what I’ve observed and been complicit in countless times - well-intentioned white people and their anemic or damaging attempts to confront racism. Well worth multiple listens. And more than her Mom will read it, believe me!

8 people found this helpful