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Loving What Is

Written by: Byron Katie,Stephen Mitchell
Narrated by: Byron Katie,Stephen Mitchell,MacLeod Andrews,Rebecca Lowman
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Publisher's Summary

Out of nowhere, like a breeze in a marketplace crowded with advice, comes Byron Katie and "The Work". In the midst of a normal life, Katie became increasingly depressed and, over a 10-year period, sank further into rage, despair, and thoughts of suicide. Then, one morning, she woke up in a state of absolute joy, filled with the realization of how her own suffering had ended. The freedom of that realization has never left her, and now, in Loving What Is, you can discover the same freedom through The Work.

The Work is simply four questions that, when applied to a specific problem, enable you to see what is troubling you in an entirely different light. As Katie says, "It's not the problem that causes our suffering; it's our thinking about the problem." Contrary to popular belief, trying to let go of a painful thought never works; instead, once we have done The Work, the thought lets go of us. At that point we can truly love what is, just as it is.

Loving What Is will show you step by step, through clear and vivid examples, exactly how to use this revolutionary process for yourself. You'll see people do The Work with Katie on a broad range of human problems, from a wife ready to leave her husband because he wants more sex to a Manhattan worker paralyzed by fear of terrorism to a woman suffering over a death in her family. Many people have discovered The Work's power to solve problems; in addition, they say that through The Work they experience a sense of lasting peace and find the clarity and energy to act, even in situations that had previously seemed impossible.

If you continue to do The Work, you may discover, as many people have, that the questioning flows into every aspect of your life, effortlessly undoing the stressful thoughts that keep you from experiencing peace. Loving What Is offers everything you need to learn and live this remarkable process and to find happiness as what Katie calls "a lover of reality".

©2002 Byron Katie and Stephen Mitchell (P)2016 Random House Audio

What the critics say

"Good Lord! Where did Byron Katie come from? She's the real McCoy. Her Work is amazingly effective - a simple, straightforward antidote to the suffering we unnecessarily create for ourselves. She asks us to believe nothing, but provides a surprisingly effective and simple way to cut through the tangle of delusions we wrap ourselves in. Just reading the exchanges in Loving What Is, I can admit things I didn't want to admit and stop torturing myself in ways I didn't realize I was doing." (David Chadwick, author of Crooked Cucumber: The Life and Zen Teaching of Shunryu Suzuki)
"Suppose you could find a simple way to embrace your life with joy, stop arguing with reality, and achieve serenity in the midst of chaos? That is what Loving What Isoffers. It is no less than a revolutionary way to live your life. The question is: are we brave enough to accept it?" (Erica Jong, author of Fear of Flying)
"Byron Katie's Work is a great blessing for our planet. The root cause of suffering is identification with our thoughts, the 'stories' that are continuously running through our minds. Byron Katie's Work acts like a razor-sharp sword that cuts through that illusion and enables you to know for yourself the timeless essence of your being. Joy, peace, and love emanate from it as your natural state. In Loving What Is, you have the key. Now use it." (Eckhart Tolle, author of The Power of Now)

What listeners say about Loving What Is

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Worth the listen

If you are ready to do “the work” this is so worth the listen. I’ve had this audio book in my library for years but haven’t been able to get into it. Tried it again, and I was obviously ready, because it is changing the stories I tell myself and I am listening.

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Amazing!

This book is amazing and life altering. It is definitely a must read for anyone wanting to positively change their lives.

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Uplifting

A dear friend recommended this to me when I was stuck in a rut. Loving what is puts things in perspective and had a beautiful message about making the best of the human condition! A great listen. #audible 1

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Difficult to follow

The book feels genuinely useful but it's very difficult to follow in an audiobook format because most of the book is exercises, and written ones at that. After rewinding back and forth several times, trying to keep up with the steps it wanted me to complete on paper while the book was talking, I ended up returning it. Will probably pick up a paper copy to work with instead.

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A profound yet simple way of letting go of pain

I feel inspired and humbled by what I've heard. I keep getting the feeling like I'm on the brink of a revelation, like I've almost grasped it, and then my ordinary thought patterns try to confuse me again. I'll be doing the work until I feel more at peace with myself and the world. I've had a small taste of a universe of new, simple yet profound possibilities. Thank you!

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life changing !

thus is the vest ookIave own since I am born! I highly recommend it if you want drastic changes in ur life.

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powerful and life changing

Really enjoyed the narration and the simple, yet powerful concepts. Easy to apply and instantly life changing!

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worth the read

loved it. life changing. read it or don't. it really helped me look at my uninvestigated thoughts.

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A Life changing book!!

This is a life changing book! I listen to it repeatedly and apply it to my life! Every time I listen and apply it my life gets better... Loving what is is a daily and continuous practice!

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It works- if you’re ready for it

I bought this book 4 years ago after someone recommended it to me. I listened to it but it didn’t stick. I didn’t understand the concepts and the whole thing kinda went over my head: I wasn’t ready. I never forgot about it though. Now, 4 years later I’m starting to get the concept and it has already helped me avoid unnecessary pain.

The book is a series of scripts from sessions with the author. Since it’s a script being read by the author and a reader the reactions aren’t very realistic and can sound kind off. Still with listening to.

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  • moves
  • 2016-01-06

Go for the abridged version

This new version has Katie and various voice actors reading the dialogues from the book. It comes off as a bit wooden and staged. I would suggest going for the older, abridged version which includes live dialogues of Katie doing The Work with people, and is much more engaging in my experience.

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  • Jae Behrmann
  • 2016-05-12

Recommended by my ex-wife

This book was recommended to me by ex-wife and I was skeptical of the book's ability to impact me. However, after putting the book's principles into practice, I have noticed a shift in my thinking, attitudes, and beliefs that have positively impacted the relationship with my children. Although my ex-wife and I rarely speak, I feel much more peaceful in my outlook towards her. I recommend this book to anyone interested in improving their relationships.

40 people found this helpful

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  • Book Reader
  • 2016-09-06

The abridged version is a better audiobook

Any additional comments?

If you're new to the Byron Katie stuff, I strongly recommend the abridged version for you instead of this one. It contains live recordings of people doing 'the work' and will give you a much greater understanding of what she's getting at. This one is good as a completer...to flesh out a bit if you're interested in learning more, but it doesn't give you the up close understanding what's actually happening emotionally and intellectually for the people in the dialogues.

38 people found this helpful

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  • Xiaonan
  • 2018-02-21

I like the original better

I personally prefer the original reading with the recordings from the actual workshops, it was more authentic and more relatable.

35 people found this helpful

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  • Chelsea
  • 2020-08-18

Wildly Irresponsible

Byron Katie is a dangerous woman - powerful for sure, and toxic in both her thoughts and the lack of caution she shows in using her influence to suggest shockingly harmful methods of emotional suppression and denial of the self. I listened as if watching a car accident. It's a woman's own fault she was sexually abused? And she should apologize both to herself and her abuser for blaming him, and say thank you...? Very cult like, very dangerous, very disturbing. Go listen to anything by Brene Brown instead and have a better life.

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  • Shelly Rosen
  • 2018-08-18

Awful!!!

Do not waste your time or money! Worst book ever!! Her theories and practices are ridiculous.

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  • Justine Levy
  • 2021-05-20

I really wanted to like this book

Byron Katie's oversimplification about very nuanced problems is honestly insulting. I really wanted to like this book because Mike Birbiglia endorsed it on a podcast and I think he's great. But I hated this book. I'm glad that Katie's philosophy brought her peace but I feel like she is teaching people to gaslight themselves. There is a point where she encourages a victim of sexual assault to take a "piece of the blame" and I was just dumbfounded. Her philosophy is delusional and harmful in my opinion.

12 people found this helpful

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  • Jacopo
  • 2017-12-29

To the point

If you could sum up Loving What Is in three words, what would they be?

Practical, ready to apply, immediately beneficial (a rarity for self help-books)

What was one of the most memorable moments of Loving What Is?

Hearing "the work" being applied to the most extreme cases (rape, incest... oof) and maintaining its simplicity and straightforwardness

Which scene was your favorite?

Hearing someone get clarity is always a joy, many examples of that in this book

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

Sort of; I listened to it in big chunks, but having some time to digest (and APPLY) the information step by step is highly suggested

Any additional comments?

I would recommend this book especially to selfhelp-nuts, who maybe are getting bored of high concepts with debatable applicability. The simplicity of this will be refreshing.

12 people found this helpful

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  • L. Martinez
  • 2018-01-22

Truly Life Changing

What did you love best about Loving What Is?

Before listening to this book my negative thoughts consume my life. I was depressed, unmotivated, angry, and overall unhappy The bad things that happen to me kept replaying in my head along with all the things people had done to me that hurt me. Katie helped me realized the power my thoughts have over me and that I can change them by answering her four questions. It really is very simple. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

What did you like best about this story?

Hearing people go over the four questions with Katie.

Which character – as performed by the narrators – was your favorite?

Katie the narrator did an excellent job.

What insight do you think you’ll apply from Loving What Is?

The four questions.

Any additional comments?

Highly recommend everyone to read/listen to this book.

8 people found this helpful

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  • Shelley G.
  • 2019-10-22

What a crock!!

Talk about FALSE GUILT!!!

I can only say that this is proof positive that anyone can publish a book, however irresponsible it may be 🙄

Having spent my fair share of time in the counselor's office, coming to terms with crippling anxiety for not living up to the expectations of others, I find this book absolutely ludicrous.

Turning everything around so that I/you are the person at fault, is beyond me.

4 people found this helpful

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  • Client Amazon
  • 2021-10-06

Life changing, mind blowing

"The work" is one possible way to put wisdom and truth into action. The result is just absolutely amazing. It's the doorway to enlightenment. This book is a gem. I read it all over again and again. I do the work every time I'm stuck, and every time, freedom shows, dramatically. Byron Katie got struck at the age of 43 by an insight as deep as the truth about our nature as human beings. If we were all to do the work, this world would be paradise. By the way, just do it for yourself, and that's what you'll get.

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  • ella iacob
  • 2021-05-08

Great technique

Already known for “the work”, after reading the book, i started to really put it in practice. And ... it works

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  • Kindle Customer
  • 2018-11-29

love the concept of Inquiry. long book though

love the concept and looking forward to apply the work on my life.

unfortunately it's very lengthy, with little focus on helping you to apply the concepts on your life. could have been 1-2 hour book