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  • Trauma Bonding: Understanding and Overcoming the Trauma Bond in a Narcissistic Relationship

  • Narcissistic Relationship Recovery, Book 1
  • Written by: Lauren Kozlowski
  • Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
  • Length: 1 hr and 37 mins
  • 4.7 out of 5 stars (49 ratings)

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Trauma Bonding: Understanding and Overcoming the Trauma Bond in a Narcissistic Relationship cover art

Trauma Bonding: Understanding and Overcoming the Trauma Bond in a Narcissistic Relationship

Written by: Lauren Kozlowski
Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
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Publisher's Summary

"If your relationship is so bad, why don't you just leave them?"

"If you were in such an abusive relationship, why did you stay with them for so long?"

"If you knew you were in a relationship with such a toxic person, why didn't you ask people for help?"

If you've ever been asked these questions, aside from being ignorant and hurtful, you'll know it's beyond frustrating. The answer to the above questions, whilst it's complex and often confusing, can be given with two words: trauma bonded. If you find you're in a relationship that you know is so toxic that it's crushing your very being, but you can't bring yourself to leave, you may be in the clutches of a tight trauma bond. 

If you're constantly feeling on edge, forever working to appease your spouse to little avail and feel like you're constantly being chipped away at with their abusive behavior, then I can understand how emotionally shattering it feels to live this way. 

If, in the same breath, it breaks your heart to even consider leaving them because you can't imagine life without them, then I can understand that feeling too - because I was trauma bonded to my abusive ex. 

From my own personal experience and from the experiences other survivors have opened up to me about, this book will cover the following: 

  • What trauma bonding really is 
  • The seven stages that lead to you becoming trauma bonded 
  • The parallels that Stockholm syndrome has with trauma bonding 
  • The five stages you go through when you come to accept you're trauma bonded - the cognitive dissonance a trauma bond can cause 
  • Breaking free from the traumatic bond 

This book will also include my own experiences and I'll draw upon those to help you really understand trauma bonding, and let you know that you're not alone in being shackled by this emotionally crippling bond. More importantly, this book will help you understand that the invisible chain that tethers you to your abuser can be broken.

©2020 Escape The Narcissist (P)2020 Escape The Narcissist

What listeners say about Trauma Bonding: Understanding and Overcoming the Trauma Bond in a Narcissistic Relationship

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Knowledge is Power

I found this to be a very helpful book!
It was full of great information, and helped to remind me of some things that I had already learned, but needed a little reminder.
I find it very helpful to go back and refresh my knowledge, when I'm feeling sucked back in!
I have been in a Relationship with my Childrens father for 23 years, and this last year it quite literally almost took my life! I came to understand that I am EXTREMELY trauma bonded with him, and am trying my best to understand it, and fight it. I can't afford Therapy, so I try to educate myself the best I can.
With this book being quite short, it is perfect for me to be able to re-listen to when I feel myself slipping back in the pits.
Sending out Good Vibes, and Strenght to anyone having to read this book.

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  • Dez
  • 2021-04-15

Nailed it... And it's still a hard topic to hear.

Great job navigating the whys of an abusive relationship. Validates the victim and provides real understanding as to why people return to the abuse. Could have had more resources for the recovery, as it can take years, but can be summed up as lots of deliberate changes to relearn what healthy is. Really insightful and recommended for anyone interested in the practical psychology of trauma bonding.

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Quick help

This book explains the trauma bond flawlessly and feels like the hug you need. I just left an abuser and this was so helpful to keep me strong and because it's a short book you can get a lot of information quickly to help keep you on the right journey of healing.

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Realization of the situation I’m struggling with

Tools offered to work on myself. Understanding how trauma bond works at the level of the brain and all the complexities it has

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  • Sue
  • 2023-11-13

Super helpful

This is a Very insightful book with practical steps to get out of a narcissistic relationship.

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Thank You!

Beautifully articulated! I’m in the midst of leaving my covert NRC… or should I say… I’m in the midst of leaving a monster. This book helps me a lot and I have recommended it to friends.

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Trauma bonding is real

I need to listen to this a few times, I cried throughout most of it the first time. My only complaint: Wish it was longer.

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Excellent

-easy to understand amd very on point. Really opened my eyes to the truth. Thank you.

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This helped to clarify trauma bonding

The information helped me understand my toxic relationship with my husband. I'm in the process of evicting my narc husband. I now understand my trauma bond. I can love ❤️ & forgive myself for being in it for 36 years. I'm am know free.
thank you for this short concise book.
Di Lozier

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Extremely beneficial

This book put into words many of my emotions. It helped clarify so much of the relationship. Not only does it help validate the struggles of the trauma bond but it also provides some very useful ways of processing and beginning to heal. Highly recommend it

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