Discovering you’re ADHD later in life can be a profound and disorienting experience—especially when it means re-examining your relationships, identity, and even your sense of self. For many ADHD adults, the post-diagnosis journey brings unique challenges and unexpected waves of both relief and shame.

In this episode, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss the post-discovery experience of ADHD, both independent of or including an Autism diagnosis, exploring how ADHD can impact self-perception, partnerships, and daily living. Drawing from their own stories and clinical expertise, Patrick and Megan Anna reflect on internalized ableism, common misconceptions, relationship dynamics, and the emotionally complex reality of integrating an Autistic and ADHD (AuDHD) identity.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Gain a compassionate, firsthand perspective on the emotional aftermath of discovering you’re ADHD as an adult—including how shame, self-acceptance, and relief can intermingle in unexpected ways.
2. Understand the nuanced impact of ADHD traits on relationships, from struggles with contentment and impulsivity to the important role of neurotype-informed partnership accommodations.
3. Hear honest discussion about the societal framing of ADHD and Autism for AuDHDers, internalized stigma, and the lifelong process of making peace with the challenging (and sometimes conflicting) aspects of a dual-neurotype identity.

If you’re navigating your own late-in-life ADHD discovery—or supporting someone who is—this episode offers insight, validation, and real talk about what it means to live and grow as an ADHD adult.

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✨ Landmark College Success Center

Landmark College Success Center, located in San Mateo, California, provides academic support, executive function coaching, and transition-to-college skills training for neurodiverse learners, both in-person and online. A subsidiary of Landmark College (

After discovering you’re Autistic or have ADHD, you most likely started to re-examine the past—and the realization of missed cues or misunderstood moments can bring up nostalgia, relief, and even regret. Revisiting friendships, relationships, and life events through a newly understood neurodivergent lens is often emotional but also essential for self-understanding.

In this episode, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss the emotional journey that comes after Autism and ADHD discovery. They share how new self-knowledge reshapes memories, relationships, and the way they relate to themselves and others. Through candid stories about dating, friendships, family dynamics, and personal growth, Patrick and Megan Anna unpack the joys and heartaches of looking back, recontextualizing the past, and navigating big feelings that surface post-diagnosis.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Gain insight into the emotional rollercoaster many neurodivergent people experience after a new diagnosis or self-identification, including “aha” moments and the complex process of reframing past experiences with new understanding.
2. Hear personal stories about dating, friendship, and family dynamics that will resonate if you’ve ever wondered why life felt “off”—and how the right framework changes everything.
3. Find compassionate guidance on repairing relationships, managing nostalgia or regret, and embracing self-compassion during a sometimes messy process of self-discovery.

Whether you’re in the midst of self-discovery or supporting someone who is, this conversation brings real-life honesty and practical wisdom to a journey that can be both destabilizing and transformative.

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🎙️Listen to more episodes of the Divergent Conversations Podcast

🎙️Spotify

🎙️Apple

🎙️YouTube Music

▶️ YouTube

💬 Join Divergent Conversations Underground

————————————————————————————————

✨ Landmark College Success Center

Landmark College Success Center, located in San Mateo, California, provides academic support, executive function coaching, and transition-to-college skills training for neurodiverse learners, both in-person and online. A subsidiary of Landmark College (

Language matters, especially when it shapes how we, as neurodivergent people, are seen and understood. Conversations about an alleged "Autism epidemic" are everywhere—and can lead to misinformation, stigma, and feelings of shame for Autistic people and families. This episode aims to untangle the myths versus realities, providing crucial clarity and validation in a world full of loaded headlines.

In this episode, Patrick Casale and Dr. Megan Anna Neff, two AuDHD mental health professionals, discuss the narrative that autism is an "epidemic" with Dr. Donna Henderson, an experienced neuropsychologist and co-author of Is This Autism? They discuss the real reasons behind the increasing rates of autism diagnosis, unpack harmful rhetoric, trace the shifting diagnostic criteria and historical context, and highlight what these changes mean for Autistic people today. The episode also offers insight into the lasting impact of stigma—and why representation and affirming conversation make a difference.

Top 3 reasons to listen to the entire episode:

1. Gain accurate, research-driven explanations for rising Autism diagnosis rates—understand how changes in diagnostic tools, societal awareness, and self-identification impact the numbers, rather than believing harmful, epidemic-based narratives.
2. Learn how language like "epidemic" can shape public perception and personal identity, fueling unnecessary shame and fear, and creating barriers to self-understanding, safety, and acceptance for Autistic people.
3. Hear Dr. Donna Henderson’s expert insights and engaging stories, plus practical discussion about self-advocacy, changes in mental health fields, and the vital importance of community, representation, and historical context.

If you've encountered confusing headlines or faced questions about "what’s really going on with increased Autism discovery," this episode provides the clarity, validation, and nuanced perspective the neurodivergent community deserves.

More about Dr. Donna Henderson:

Dr. Donna Henderson has been a clinical psychologist for over 30 years. She is passionate about identifying and supporting autistic individuals, particularly those who camouflage, and she is co-author (with Drs. Sarah Wayland and Jamell White) of two books: Is This Autism? A guide for clinicians and everyone else and Is This Autism? A companion guide for diagnosing. Dr. Henderson’s professional home is The Stixrud Group in Silver Spring, Maryland, where she provides neuropsychological evaluations and consultations for children, adolescents, and adults who would like to understand themselves better. She is a sought-after lecturer on the less obvious presentations of autism, autistic girls and women, PDA, and on parenting children with complex profiles. She also provides case consultations and neurodiversity-affirmative training for other healthcare professionals.

• Dr. Donna Henderson's Website: drdonnahenderson.com
• You can grab Dr. Donna Henderson's books here: isthisautism.com
• Donna’s Trainings:
• Is This Autism? — Clinical Version
• Is This Autism? — For Everyone Else
• Dr. Neff’s article: Is Autism Really On the Rise: