Decision dread, analysis paralysis, and the fear of “messing it up” can keep you stuck on the couch while life moves on. In this episode, Andrew and Cat break down how to make choices with more ease, treat “wrong” choices as data, and shift from scarcity (“there’s only one right path”) to abundance (“there’s another bus coming”). Expect gentle reframes, fast decision tools, and permission to experiment.

• There are almost no “wrong” choices—only feedback. A result you don’t like is information for your next step.
• Indecision is a decision. Choosing not to choose keeps you in anxiety; pick a direction and learn.
• What’s meant for you won’t pass you by. Missed chances circle back in new ways; rejection can be protection.
• Widen the timeline. Over five years, most choices matter far less than they feel in the moment.
• Abundance > scarcity. Assume more options, more chances, and more support are on their way.

• 30-Second “gut check”

1. Take 3 slow breaths.
2. Say Choice A out loud; notice your body’s micro-response (expand or shrink?).
3. Repeat for Choice B. Choose the one that feels more expansive—not necessarily easier.

• Two-way vs. one-way doors
• Most decisions are reversible (two-way). Act fast on those. Save careful deliberation for the few irreversible (one-way) choices.
• Set a decision deadline
• Define, “I’ll decide by Friday at 4pm.” Gather enough info, then commit.
• Regret test
• Ask: “Which option will I regret not trying?” Pick that.
• Premortem & 1st domino
• Imagine it went badly; list why; add safeguards. Then do the smallest first action (email, application, 10-min draft).
• Decision journal (one line!)
• “Today I chose X because Y; expected outcome Z.” Review monthly to learn your patterns.
• Micro-menu rule
• Overwhelmed by options? Narrow to two, choose, move. Practice on low-stakes stuff (meals, routes, outfits) to build the muscle.

Write:

Read it back and do that smallest step.

• “Rivers don’t run straight.” Meanders are how you move forward.
• “Opportunities are like buses; there’s another one coming.” Missing one doesn’t end the route.
• “Life is a big platter of delights.” Pick something; you can try the next dish later.
• “Rejection is protection.” Closed doors redirect you to your door.

• “There’s only one right choice.” → Abundance flip: “There are many good-enough choices.”
• “If I miss this, it’s over.” → Flip: “If it’s for me, it returns.”
• “I need 100% certainty.” → Flip: “80% clarity + action beats 100% later.”

• Feeling Like I’m Failing (pairs well with today’s topic)
• Contrast & Gratitude (how hard seasons clarify values)
• Self-Compassion (Kristin Neff) – practical exercises for kinder self-talk

📧 Coaching or...

In this heart–forward episode, Andrew shares the shoulder injury that forced him to stop, sit still, and confront a lifelong belief that his worth equals his usefulness. Cat opens up about what it’s like to love a helper who suddenly needs help—and how “failing” often just means you’re in a season of healing, not a verdict on who you are.

Expect reframes, gentle tactics for the “I’m behind” spiral, and a reminder that asking for help is a gift you give other people, too.

• Worth ≠ productivity. North American culture often ties identity to output; this season invites you to uncouple the two.
• Asking for help is pro-connection, not weak. You let loved ones feel useful and deepen bonds when you receive.
• Reframe “failure” as a phase. Rest, rehab, and regrouping are progress—just a different speed.
• Contrast creates clarity. Hard seasons sharpen gratitude and reveal what really matters.
• Interrupt the spiral. When “I’m failing” hits, use a simple, external plan to change state (temperature, movement, environment).

• The 3-step spiral interrupter

1. Tend the body: pain meds/tea/ice or heat, shower, fresh air.
2. Change state: 30-minute recharge alone, short comedy clip, music, or a brisk walk.
3. Micro-plan: one tiny win (email, stretch, refill water), then reassess.

• Ask like a giver: “Could you help me with X?” → remember you’re offering someone the gift of helping.
• Reverse-compare: stop looking only ahead; look back at how far you’ve come.
• Temperature hack: cold pack to neck/face or warm shower to reset your nervous system.
• 10–10 List: write 10 things you did do today + 10 things you’re grateful for (including your body doing basics).
• Best-friend filter: Would you say that harsh thought to your favorite person? If not, rephrase it with kindness.

Write a note to yourself that starts:

• Feelings Wheel – pinpoint what you’re actually feeling to respond better.
• Self-Compassion (Kristin Neff) – simple practices to treat yourself like a friend.
• Open Path Collective – affordable therapy options.
• The Wealthy Barber – a gentle, story-driven intro to money basics (ties into our recent money series).

📧 Questions or need a nudge? hello@fiveyearyou.com

🌐 More episodes & freebies: fiveyearyou.com

📸 Hang with us on IG: @fiveyearyou

• “Slowing down doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you’re healing what needs care.”
• “Asking for help is a gift. You’re letting someone you love feel useful.”
• “You’re not behind; you’re in a different chapter.”
• “Look back for proof, not just forward for gaps.”

• Andrew: The unexpected closeness with his dad & being cared for by his people.
• Cat: A full, memorable summer with the kids—and the flexibility to be there for family (and for Andrew).

Ever feel like you're following a script you didn’t write? In this episode, Andrew and Catherine crack open the idea that many of the “rules” we live by—college, career, homeownership, timelines for success—are completely made up. Some rules serve a purpose (looking at you, traffic lights), but others just keep us stuck, stressed, or chasing lives that don’t fit who we are.

They talk candidly about the internal rules we adopt as children, the external expectations of adulthood, and how to start rewriting your story based on what you want—not what you were told you should want.

What You’ll Learn:

• What “The Rules Are Fake” really means
• Why the traditional path of school → job → house → retire may not be for everyone
• How to question whether a rule is helping you or holding you back
• Why homeownership and college aren't the only paths to stability or success
• How internal rules (like "I should have it all figured out by 40") create anxiety
• The power of rewriting your personal playbook and defining success on your own terms

Key Takeaways:

• Some rules are helpful; others are just habits. Pause and ask: Is this true for me?
• College and buying a house can be amazing—but they’re not mandatory.
• “Should” is often a red flag. If you hear yourself say “I should…”, dig deeper.
• Happiness doesn’t come after you follow the rules—it comes when you live from the inside out.
• It’s okay to walk a different path. In fact, it might be the best decision you ever make.

Your Glimmers of the Week:

Catherine finds joy in morning rainbows from crystal sun-catchers, and Andrew reflects on a meaningful trip to see Ben Platt live—with a reminder that you deserve beautiful experiences too.

🧭 Want to start living life by your own rules?

Visit FiveYearYou.com to book a mentoring call and begin your path to intentional living.

Making friends as a grown-up isn’t as easy as it used to be. In this vulnerable and practical episode, Andrew and Catherine talk candidly about their own struggles with adult friendship—and why it's harder than it looks. From mom-friend pickup lines at the park to feeling ghosted after a good conversation, they explore what makes friendships work, how to initiate without overthinking it, and why proximity and personality play such a big role.

If you’ve ever wondered “Is it just me?”—this one’s for you.

What You’ll Learn:

• Why making friends as an adult is harder than it was in school
• How introverts and extroverts experience friendship differently
• Why proximity, shared interests, and vulnerability matter
• Two practical ways to connect with new people
• How to handle ghosting, rejection, or just plain busy lives
• Why it’s okay (and smart) to have different friends for different parts of your life
• How to initiate friendship without feeling awkward
• The “3 friend types” to surround yourself with for connection and growth

Practical Tips From the Episode:

• Ask for numbers (even if it feels like dating)
• Reach out to old friends—just be honest
• Be vulnerable or be curious (ideally both!)
• Don’t expect one person to meet every need
• Embrace diversity in age, interests, and energy levels
• Let go of perfection and initiate anyway

Your Glimmers of the Week:

Catherine discovers the joy (and simplicity) of homemade key lime pie, and Andrew shares his excitement for summer travel plans and adventures to come.

💬 Feeling isolated or struggling to find your people?

You’re not alone—and you don’t have to figure it out solo. Visit FiveYearYou.com to explore mentorship or join the community.

We all get angry—but what do you do with it? In this candid episode, Andrew and Catherine explore the role of anger in our lives, especially when we’ve been taught to suppress it or feel shame for having it. They share deeply personal stories from childhood and parenting, unpack how anger manifests in the body, and offer practical tools for managing big emotions in healthy, non-destructive ways.

From recognizing your triggers to learning how to release built-up energy before it explodes, this conversation is full of useful takeaways for anyone who wants to handle anger with more awareness and grace.

What You’ll Learn:

• Why anger is a normal (and even necessary) emotion
• How unprocessed anger can show up physically and emotionally
• Strategies for defusing tension in the moment (even if you’re at a 10!)
• The importance of self-awareness and communicating your emotional state
• Safe and effective ways to release anger—without harming relationships
• How to identify when anger has turned into something more dangerous

Resources & Mentions:

• Box breathing technique
• Rebounding for emotional release
• The power of 30 minutes alone (Catherine’s go-to reset strategy)
• Creating a calm home when you’re a sensory-sensitive parent
• The “Instant Pot” analogy for pressure and emotional release
• Domestic violence resources (linked in show notes)

Disclaimer:

Anger is human. Violence is not. If someone in your life is harming you physically, emotionally, or verbally, please seek help. Your safety matters. We’ve included crisis resources in the episode description.

Your Glimmer of the Week:

Andrew and Catherine share a light-hearted recap of their recent in-person visit, Canadian winter survival tips, and how creating new traditions can feel just as meaningful as honoring old ones.

🔗 Need help managing big emotions or want to work on your emotional health?

Visit FiveYearYou.com to book a free coaching call.

In this episode of the Five Year You podcast, we dive into the framework we created called The Layers of Life. This model helps you understand the difference between living a life on autopilot and living a life on purpose—from your soul outward.

We’ll walk you through the five layers:

1. Soul – your essence and spiritual center
2. Self – your emotional, mental, and physical well-being
3. Social – your relationships and sense of community
4. Substance – how you spend your time, career, and lifestyle
5. Significance – your environment, achievements, and influence

If you've ever felt like something’s missing—like you’re living from the outside in—this episode will help you re-center and start living from the inside out. We share personal stories, examples, and tiny actions to help you reconnect with your authentic self.

✨ FREE RESOURCE

Download our Layers of Life visual guide:

https://fiveyearu.com/layers-of-life

💌 Stay connected

Email us anytime at: hello@fiveyearyou.com

We’d love to hear what pizza crust you like… or what part of your soul you’re ready to rediscover.

🔗 Other Links

Website: https://fiveyearyou.com

Instagram: https://instagram.com/fiveyearyou

Podcast on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5YearYou

Podcast on Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/five-year-you

Feeling burnt out or constantly critical of yourself? In this episode, we explore how becoming your own best friend can radically transform your life, mindset, and self-worth. Learn how to talk to yourself with more compassion, set better boundaries, and build a life rooted in inner support—not just external validation.

⏱️ Episode Timestamps

00:00 - Intro: A message to the burnt-out overachiever

02:14 - What does it mean to be your own best friend?

04:51 - The difference between self-care and self-respect

07:36 - Why high-achievers often struggle with self-compassion

12:05 - “If you wouldn’t say it to a friend, don’t say it to yourself”

14:22 - Steps to stop being your own worst critic

17:47 - Internal validation vs. external chasing

21:30 - The surprising power of treating yourself kindly

📚 Resources & Mentions:

→ Listen to all episodes of the podcast: https://fiveyearyou.com/podcast

→ Free tool: Create your Five Year You plan: https://fiveyearyou.com/free

→ Our favorite book on inner dialogue: What to Say When You Talk to Yourself by Shad Helmstetter

→ Need a reset? Try the Life Reboot Intensive: https://fiveyearyou.com/reboot

📝 Want to Work With Us?

We help high-achieving, purpose-driven people redesign their lives from the inside out.

Book your complimentary mentoring call: https://fiveyearyou.com/call

📩 Let’s Connect

Have a question or want to share a glimmer? Email us: hello@fiveyearyou.com

Follow us on Instagram: https://instagram.com/fiveyearyou

We’ve all faced money stress — but what if solving financial problems could actually feel… empowering? In this episode, Andrew and Catherine share a simple 3-step framework to help you approach money issues without shame, panic, or overwhelm. Whether you're dealing with debt, budgeting challenges, or cash flow confusion, this episode will help you feel calm, clear, and ready to take action.

• Why shame keeps us stuck in money problems
• A simple 3-step framework: Define the problem, Zoom out, Take the next right step
• How to stay grounded when emotions flare up
• Why solving money problems is rarely about “just making more”
• How your nervous system affects your financial clarity
• The importance of basic needs, especially when money is tight

📌 Feelings Wheel – To name and process emotions related to money

🔗 https://feelingswheel.com

📌 The Wealthy Barber – A storytelling-based book on financial basics

🔗 https://www.amazon.com/dp/0761513116?tag=5yy-20

📌 Open Path Collective – Affordable therapy when you’re feeling stuck

🔗 https://openpathcollective.org

📌 Five Year You Coaching – Find purpose, peace, and financial clarity

🔗 https://fiveyearyou.com

📬 Email us → hello@fiveyearyou.com

🌐 Website → https://fiveyearyou.com

▶️ YouTube → https://youtube.com/@FiveYearYou

📸 Instagram → https://instagram.com/fiveyearyou

🎧 Podcast Feed → https://fiveyearyou.com/podcast

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Some links in this description may be affiliate links. As Amazon Associates, we earn from qualifying purchases using store ID amp09-20 and tracking ID 5yy-20. This helps support the podcast at no extra cost to you. Thank you!