Ever set a boundary and instantly think: “Ugh… I feel like the bad guy”? Same. This short episode explores why that happens — and how practicing clear, compassionate limits can actually create more honesty, respect, and ease in our relationships.

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In this episode, I continue my conversation with Dr. Jessica Tomasula on internalized and implicit weight bias — and the quiet ways these beliefs shape how we see our bodies, our health, and our worth.

We revisit the Girl Scout cookie story and the subtle moments where children learn what bodies “mean,” often long before anyone says it out loud. We talk about grief, identity, and the years many of us spend trying to “fix” ourselves instead of understanding the systems that taught us to feel broken.

We also explore the complicated intersection of medicine, control, and hope — including the role of GLP-1 medications — with nuance and compassion, without blame or shame.

This conversation isn’t about what bodies should look like.
It’s about how to stay connected to them — and how to notice what we may be unintentionally passing down.

We discuss:

• what internalized weight bias actually is

• how body commentary becomes “normal” in families and culture

• grief for the time spent chasing smaller bodies

• the difference between control as care vs control as punishment

• how weight bias shows up in medical spaces

• GLP-1 medications and why the conversation is so complex

• rebuilding trust with our bodies and our values

If any of this feels tender, please listen at your own pace, take breaks, and come back when you’re ready.

—

Guest:
Dr. Jessica Tomasula — psychologist, researcher, and clinician specializing in body image, eating concerns, and health psychology.

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Podcast • Stories • Conversations about “the space between”

Dr Jessica Tomasula at Live Well Psychological

Summary

This episode explores the complex issues surrounding internalized weight bias, disordered eating, and the societal messages that shape our perceptions of body image. Dr. Jess Hayden and Dr. Jessica Tomasula discuss how these biases begin at a young age, the impact of humor on self-worth, and the limitations of traditional health metrics like BMI. They also delve into the importance of promoting body acceptance and awareness in a society that often prioritizes appearance over health.

https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/

Jessica Hayden, PhD

Jessica Tomasula, PhD

In Part 2, we expand the conversation with Dr Meagan Padro to include digital safety, the reality that consent begins long before dating, and why removing shame from conversations about sex is essential for raising safe, empowered kids.

We explore how children learn consent through everyday interactions, how online spaces introduce boundary challenges earlier than many parents expect, and why fear-based or shame-based messaging can actually increase risk rather than reduce it. This episode offers a grounded, research-informed approach to helping kids develop body awareness, autonomy, and the confidence to speak up—both offline and online.

Simply Centered Psychological Services

Content note: This episode includes discussion of body safety, consent, digital behavior, and sexual development. Some topics may not be appropriate for young ears. Caregivers may want to listen privately.

Content Warning: Gentle, non-graphic discussion of consent and sexual abuse prevention.
In this episode, we explore how the words we give children shape their safety, confidence, and boundaries. Jess and Dr. Meagan Padro share how language, consent, and connection form the foundation of sex-positive parenting.

RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline

LifeLine

How to Talk to Kids Canadian Website, Great Info for Parents

Simply Centered Psychological Services

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Thanksgiving Day Special

In this mini-episode, Dr. Jess Hayden explores the layered reality of the holiday—gratitude, grief, family dynamics, and the complicated history beneath it.

Jess shares a personal reminder to slow down, the message from the tea, and a truth about constant change and how people evolve too.

If today feels tender, busy, or complicated, this episode offers a breath of steadiness.

Part 2 with Meredith Grimes, LCMHC, dives into the psychology of youth athletics and what happens when performance becomes a measure of worth.
We explore why so many athletes push through pain and injuries, how “performing for the likes” fuels burnout, and how Self-Determination Theory can transform the way coaches motivate young players. Meredith shares how imposter syndrome shows up in sport — and why the simple phrase “I don’t know” can be one of the most powerful tools for connection and growth.

This episode is for parents, coaches, and athletes navigating performance pressure, mental health, and the emotional side of competition.

Links:

⁠Simply Centered Psychological Services⁠

⁠Cognitive Distortions⁠

⁠Find Meredith

In Part 1 of this two-part conversation, therapist and former athlete Meredith Grimes shares how softball shaped her identity, influenced her path from Sports Business and Marketing into mental health, and taught her early lessons about pressure, performance, and resilience. She also reflects on how learning DBT has allowed her to teach her current clients—especially athletes—the skills she wishes she had back in high school and college.

This episode explores the space where sport, identity, and emotional skills meet.

Links:

Simply Centered Psychological Services

Cognitive Distortions

Find Meredith