Why are women’s health concerns still being dismissed and what can we do about it?

The healthcare system was not built for women. For many of us, especially in midlife, our health concerns are dismissed, misunderstood, or flat-out ignored. And when you’re navigating the storm of divorce at the same time as perimenopause or menopause? It can feel like you’re unraveling.

I’m joined by Phoenix Rising member Kathy Gould, a holistic health coach, personal trainer, life coach, lactation consultant, and current grad student finishing her second Master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy. (I’m telling you, the women in Phoenix Rising are BADASS!)

This episode started as a guest expert session inside Phoenix Rising (my divorce empowerment collective for women). The conversation was so powerful, I knew I had to bring it to the podcast.

Kathy and I get into why the medical system has failed women, how we’ve been gaslit about our own bodies, and what it looks like to take our power back especially during times of massive upheaval like divorce. We are not meant to go through this quietly, and we are certainly not meant to go through it alone.

What you’ll hear about in this episode:

• Why women’s health is dismissed, especially in midlife (6:11)

• The deep need for more open, supportive conversations around our wellness (12:14)

• The long-standing misconceptions about hormone replacement therapy (HRT) (16:41)

• What Kathy recommends for women going through both divorce and menopause at the same time (35:15)

• How to advocate for yourself when doctors aren’t listening (especially if they’re covered by insurance) (41:59)

Learn more about Kathy Gould: Kathy is an integrative holistic health coach, life coach and personal trainer. She is also a certified lactation consultant. She holds a Masters Degree in Health Psychology and is currently finishing a second Masters Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy. Kathy is passionate about women's health and wellness and has dedicated her career to women's physical and emotional wellness.

Resources & Links:
Follow The Divorce Survival Guide on YouTube! Video episodes become available starting next week (July 24th!)

Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate
The Divorce Survival Guide Resource Bundle
Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective

Kathy’s website
Kathy on Instagram

NY Times Article: Women Have Been Misled About Menopause

Menopause Barbie on YouTube: Dr. Barbara Taylor

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DISCLAIMER: THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.

Episode link:
https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-332-divorce-menopause-and-medical-gaslighting-with-kathy-gould/

Have you ever felt like if you don’t do it, it just won’t get done? Like the relationship, the parenting, the emotional glue that holds everything together is your job? You might be an overfunctioning woman and this episode is your loving (but no-nonsense) invitation to finally let it go.

I’m joined by Dr. Ashley Southard, a licensed marriage and family therapist with over two decades of experience, who has lived the overfunctioning pattern in her own life and now helps women heal from it. We talk about what it really means to carry more than your fair share in a relationship, and how that relentless push to keep things going (when your partner won’t meet you halfway) can cost you your sanity, your health, and your sense of self.

If you’re tired, burnt out, and wondering why your relationships feel like so much work, it might be time to stop proving your worth and start receiving real love. And if your partner doesn’t rise when you stop overfunctioning? That’s information. The question becomes: what are you willing to do about it?

Here’s what else we discuss in this episode:

• What overfunctioning really is and how it’s even rooted in emotional labor and patriarchy (4:10)

• How underfunctioning shows up in a partner (think: not pulling their weight emotionally) (12:42)

• Why an overfunctioning woman needs an underfunctioning partner (17:56)

• How to begin healing from overfunctioning by stepping back, tolerating discomfort, and rebuilding a relationship with yourself (20:07)

• What it means to become a Self-Restored Woman: As Dr. Ashley says, “A woman who no longer works for breadcrumbs and knows she’s worthy of a feast.” (32:42)

• The Great Rest: what your nervous system does when you finally stop overfunctioning (36:52)

• A few small but powerful first steps if you’re starting to identify with this pattern and want to make a change (40:07)

Learn more about Dr. Ashley Southard: Dr. Ashley Southard is a psychotherapist in Scottsdale, AZ, specializing in The Overfunctioning Woman in Love who is struggling with the confusing, exhausting, and lonely dynamics of a one-sided, unfulfilling love relationship. With over 20 years of clinical experience treating complex trauma, anxiety, depression, eating disorders, and relationship issues, coupled with her own personal journey out of Overfunctioning, Dr. Ashley loves nothing more than creating an emotionally safe space for women to discover that they are not ‘crazy’ or ‘broken’…and that they have the power to become the Self-Restored Woman they were always meant to be!

Dr. Ashley is also very active on Instagram, offering life-changing information to “make sense out of the nonsense.” She has amassed a strong following of women who are remembering their power, learning how to come back home to themselves, and healing in community with other Self-Restoring women.

Resources & Links:
Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate
The Divorce Survival Guide Resource Bundle
Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective
Dr. Ashley’s website

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DISCLAIMER: THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.

Episode link:
https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-331-the-overfunctioning-woman-with-dr-ashley-southard/

I’m joined once again by Laurie James for a conversation that bridges nervous system healing, somatic experiencing, and attachment work. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed or disconnected in relationships, this episode will help you understand why and what to do about it.

Laurie isn’t just a coach and author, she’s someone who’s done the deep work to regulate her nervous system after divorce and heartbreak. In this episode, she shares how her body responded completely differently to a recent breakup, not with panic, but with presence. That’s what nervous system healing looks like in real time.

We also dig into attachment styles: how to identify your own, how they show up in anxious or avoidant behaviors, and how somatic work can support real change. Most importantly, we talk about how to stop trying to fix or override your system and start building safety within it. This is about meeting yourself where you are and knowing that real healing is possible.

Here’s what else we discuss in this episode:

• What somatic experiencing actually is and how it supports healing (7:31)

• How your autonomic nervous system operates and what shifts when you engage it intentionally (9:42)

• The connection between nervous system regulation, somatic work, and attachment styles (16:52)

• How Laurie’s recent breakup differed from her divorce (and why it matters) (40:44)

• Practical strategies for working with an avoidant or anxious attachment style (46:45)

Learn more about Laurie James: Laurie James is a mother, divorcée, recovering caregiver turned author, somatic relationship coach, and podcaster. Laurie’s podcast, Confessions of a Freebird, was inspired by her youngest of four children leaving the nest and is the sequel to her book, Sandwiched: A Memoir of Holding On and Letting Go.

Laurie’s book is about her journey from loneliness to finding belonging during a time when she was raising four teenage daughters, her mother had a heart attack and needed care, all while her marriage began to crumble.

Now Laurie helps women divorce, heal, and date differently in midlife. She blends her coaching and somatic training to help her clients develop a better relationship with their bodies and nervous system. Doing so allows them to find the inner freedom to experience more happiness, joy and create the life they desire.

Resources & Links:
The Divorce Survival Guide Resource Bundle
Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective
Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate
Laurie’s website
Laurie on Instagram
Laurie’s podcast
Laurie's Beginner's Guide to Somatic Healing

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DISCLAIMER: THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.

Episode link:
https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-330-attachment-styles-amp-somatic-healing-with-laurie-james/