Epic Comedy

From Snuff: Vimes looked at the cover. The title was The World of Poo. When his wife was out of eyeshot he carefully leafed through it. Well, okay, you had to accept that the world had moved on and these days’ fairy stories were probably not going to be about twinkly little things with wings. As he turned page after page, it dawned on him that whomever had written this book, they certainly knew what would make kids like Young Sam laugh until they were nearly sick. The bit about sailing down the river almost made him smile.

With the way behind them sealed, the only way forward for Eve and her friends is down. Down the narrow steps carved into the mountain. Down into the oppressive toxic fog. Down into the Dead Fields. But the Dead Fields are not so dead as they seem. Things lurk in the mist, things far beyond the levels of Eve, Wes, Preston, and, especially, the hatchling Reginald.

Being the Dark Lord and Prince of Evil is not as much fun as it sounds, particularly if you are a basically decent person. King Mordak is just such a person. Technically he's more goblin than person, but the point is that he is really keen to be a lot less despicable than his predecessors. Not that the other goblins appreciate Mordak's attempts to redefine the role. Why should they when his new healthcare program seems designed to actually extend life expectancy, and his efforts to end a perfectly reasonable war with the dwarves appear to have become an obsession?

The Pyrates is all the swashbucklers that ever were, rolled into one great technicoloured pantomime - tall ships and desert islands, impossibly gallant adventurers and glamorous heroines, buried treasure and black spots, devilish dons and ghastly dungeons, plots, duels, escapes, savage rituals, tender romance and steaming passion, all to the accompaniment of ringing steel, thunderous broadsides, sweeping film music, and the sound of cursing extras falling in the water and exchanging period dialogue.

The adventure continues. Tim and the C and C gang face their most difficult challenges yet. Horses die. Eyeballs are eaten. People are urinated on. A god is born.

Piers Anthony delivers another tale set in the best-selling world of Xanth, filled with magic, surprises, adventure, and a few puns. Here's what the author has to say about his new book: "Five Portraits is a kind of sequel to Board Stiff in that it picks up where the other leaves off, with the same characters. Apart from that, it's one of my favorites within the series.

Megan Harris had hopes of seeing the world, but at twenty-five she’s never even left Florida. Now a wedding invitation lures her to Quebec…in February. When her ex-friend Scarlett offers to be her plus-one (yeah, that’s a whole story) and suggests they turn the journey into an epic road trip, Megan reluctantly agrees to the biggest adventure of her life.

Hi, how are you? Yes, I am talking to you, the reader of this book's description. Okay, I get it, fourth-wall breaking is overdone. Get over it. This book, Villains Rule, is a fantasy action-comedy which you have to hear. Not because it redefines the genre, far from it. But rather for what it contains. A villain's tale. How often do you get to listen to a story where the villain is the protagonist? No, not an anti-hero, or a brooding monster, nor a hero thinly disguised as a villain. And not evil. If you want evil, take that nonsense to therapy.

There's a war brewing between high-level factions, a conflict Eve finds herself caught in the middle of. Soon enough, this secret plot, this life quest, this entire broken trilogy will come hurtling to an end. Perhaps, with any luck, there will be a loaf of bread waiting on the other side. Or maybe the real loaf of bread was the friends we made along the way. Those friends that made it through, that is.

Waldo and company arrive looking for information. What they find is a suspicious mage guild, a delusional queen, an entire city awash in greed and deception, and an old acquaintance who is very happy to see him again. Getting the information he's looking for won't be easy, but when has that ever stopped Waldo?

Living in a virtual game world sounds like the ultimate dream. Plenty of action, intrigue, and guess who gets to be the big hero? But what happens when that digital reality gets flipped on its head? Bad guys are after your sweet loot, your fancy title is loaded with unrealistic expectations, and achieving such a high level comes with a big fat target on your back. Something has to give, so when a new crusader faction rolls into town, Talon senses an opportunity.

All Lex wanted was to help his good buddy Gryph find his sister and maybe save the world along the way. But everything goes wrong from the start when Lex gets separated from Gryph during their transfer into the Realms. Lost, alone, and forced to live the same day over and over, Lex must defeat the agent of a despotic god, uncover hidden truths about himself, and find his way back to his friend. If he fails the Realms face destruction.

Waldo's on the run again. He escapes Melissa's grasp but is marked by her Death Seal. What is there to do but keep going forward? Follow Waldo, Alice, and Gronk as they deal with spies, smugglers, and giant monsters. Meanwhile, Melissa has problems of her own back in Torikai. While in the land of Dark Mages, Lilith begins putting her plans into action. Waldo finds himself in a port city with no one willing to take him and his party where he needs to go. Just what will he have to do to get passage? If you're desperate enough, you can always find someone willing to make a deal.

The near future. Earth has been invaded by the L'zuhl, an aggressive, imperialistic alien race who have laid waste to the galaxy for centuries. The few human survivors have been evacuated to the farthest reaches of space to rebuild and fight back against the L'zuhl onslaught. There, on the distant planet of Palangonia, in a large, walled compound that houses the new human colony, lives the former Newcastle United and England boss Kevin Keegan, now manager of Palangonia FC.

R. K. Billiau presents book three in the PrimeVerse series.

Going back home was not exactly what Tim and the C&C gang expected. Trouble continues to follow them back to Gulf Coast Mississippi. Trouble...and a gnome...and an undead midget.

To become a Dark Lord is no easy thing. The simple ambition to hold dominion over the world and bend all to your will sounds straightforward, but it's not. There are armies to raise, fortresses to build, heroes to defeat, and battles to be fought. After many spectacular failures, Evil decided to lend more than inspiration to these would-be tyrants. He wrote an easy-to-follow Dark Lord's Handbook. And yet the next Dark Lord that came along screwed up like all the others.

Milton Frederick was arguably the best player of Crowned Lieges of Destiny in the entire world. As the strategy coordinator for one of the top guilds, he was beginning to actually make a living from it. That was, until he was abducted by aliens. Severely damaged and confused about what happened to him, he woke up to find himself trapped inside a massive chicken egg on a strange, primitive world filled with curious - and deadly - creatures. Now, in order to survive, Milton has to rely on a snarky, foul-mouthed AI guide to show him what it means to be a Station Core.

Fred the Mermaid has taken the bait and chosen to date Artur, Prince of the Black Sea, over human marine biologist Thomas. And just in time. The existence of the Undersea Folk is no longer a secret, and someone needs to keep them from floundering in the media spotlight. Fred has all the right skills for that job, but has a hard time when her real father surfaces and tries to overthrow Artur's regime.

Self-proclaimed conqueror Auroro and his contracted guide, Rynissie, have hit the road. They have had a simple errand (read: most important task) entrusted to them and are heading to the cave-elf city of Cerulean-in-the-Mountain.... Or at least that was the plan. Auroro has decided to be efficient. They're going to do some jobs along the way and make some money! Sounds simple enough, right? Unfortunately, things are not normal in the forests of Viridia.