Get a free audiobook

More Bedtime Stories for Cynics

Written by: Nick Offerman
Length: 3 hrs and 26 mins
4 out of 5 stars (62 ratings)

CDN$ 14.95/month after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

Publisher's Summary

Make sure the kids aren’t around! Just because you’re a grown-up doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the art of the children’s bedtime story. Nick Offerman presents this collection of 15 short stories written in the style of a classic kid’s tale, but with a decidedly dark and adult approach. 

What really happened after Snow White died, from the perspective of the one medically trained dwarf? A naive wizard professor reports back from the trenches of an underprivileged school of magic. A middle age man is haunted by the voices of his own aging body. 

The stories will make you laugh, cry and probably squirm a little. All performed by actors like Patrick Stewart, Alia Shawkat, Ellen Page, Mike Birbiglia, and many more.

This is an Audible Original Podcast. Free for members. You can download all 15 episodes to your Library now.

©2019 Audible Originals, LLC (P)2019 Audible Originals, LLC

More from the same

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

Overall

  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    40
  • 4 Stars
    10
  • 3 Stars
    2
  • 2 Stars
    3
  • 1 Stars
    7

Performance

  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    40
  • 4 Stars
    5
  • 3 Stars
    2
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    4

Story

  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    32
  • 4 Stars
    10
  • 3 Stars
    2
  • 2 Stars
    2
  • 1 Stars
    6
Sort by:
  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars

Allow Continuous Play

I really like the episode idea, but please make it so you can continuously listen to one episode aftet another. Hands free is so much better while driving.

12 of 14 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

Funny, great musi

Funny. Weird. I really, really love the music though. It reminds me of Trent Reznor's piano playing.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

they are funny. The short stories are hilarous.

I just love them. I am going to finish listening to the rest of them

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Alway can use humor

Must admit laugh my butt, thank you for cheering us up!! Laughter is the best medicine and this was my medicine Thank you

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Not your average bedtime stories!

Surprising stories that are truly enjoyable. Very entertaining to say the least. Will be sure to provide a chuckle.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • zos
  • 2019-08-13

why I keep audible sub!

loved it a lot! I'm enjoying it like hell!
I totally suggest it! every story different narrator!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

The three F’s...

Fucking funny, Fucking crude, Fucking awesome. For a few bucks...

I would go back for more!!

1 of 2 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

these are unbelievably entertaining!!!

I have a great time listening to these while hiking. i laugh out loud and scare the woodland creatures, which seems somehow appropriate! these fractured fairy tales are wonderful. nice to get such high quality member perks!

1 of 2 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars

Virtue Signalling Nonsense....

This was horrible to try to listen to. While I was OK with one of the stories, most of what I heard was politically correct nonsense. The Evangelical Hollywood Left needs to stop or it will destroy any credibility it has left. Time to move on, boys and girls. Go and listen to Mikail Bulgakov, Mark Twain, Jane Austen, or some other real literature and leave this junk behind.

6 of 13 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Birds Smoking

Birds Smoking - HILARIOUS!!!!
Very imaginative but truly, who's to say your wrong ??? Thanks. Truly enjoyable.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful