This week I'm answering a coaching call question from an extended breastfeeding mom:
"My toddler often doesn't accept dad at night when she wakes up crying. I am and have always been the preferred parent. I have just found out about a work trip I need to take which will have me away from my 2-year-old overnight for the first time. Typically, I feed her to sleep and to resettle throughout the night. If I am out of the house for bedtime, she does goes to sleep for other people, but it often takes a lot longer than if I am doing bedtime.

Wondering if you had any tips that might help them both prepare for my work trip over the next few weeks and allow dad to be involved in general?"

While there are a lot of things can be done to indirectly support a family in this situation, in this podcast episode, I break down a simple 3 part strategy to support a non-breastfeeding parent & a breastfed toddler for their first night(s) alone together.

Whether you decide to night wean ahead of time or not (and I do explore this a little more in the episode), bolstering and leveraging your child's connection with the person who will be caring for them is key to a relaxing time apart.

1. Find more opportunities for playful interactions between dad & kiddo (without pulling back from your own playful interactions with your child.)
2. Utilizing "bridging" tools to help your child feel connected with you even when you are apart and help that separation feel less scary and intense.
3. Expand the non-breastfeeding caregiver's capacity to hold space for the feelings that may come up.

Resources Mentioned:
https://developingchild.harvard.edu/science/key-concepts/serve-and-return/

Want to learn more from me?
Watch my free, instant access workshop:
Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery

Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guide

Love this episode?! Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it. <3

**SUBMIT YOUR Q FOR ME TO ANSWER IN FUTURE EPISODES**

In this week's episode of Start to Stop Toddler Breastfeeding, I'm answering a question I received from a student in Own Your Breastfeeding Story.

"How can I encourage my 2 year old to settle down when he is on the bed with us?

We cosleep and most of the time especially in the morning when he wakes up, after he nurses from me, he immediately goes to wake up our 4 month old, or will start making big movements that will wake her up.

We try to explain to him that when the newborn is sleeping (or anyone) we whisper and we try not to disturb them.

Is this an unrealistic expectation of a toddler? What else can we do? "

This kind of situation comes up in lots of different contexts - and for tandem breastfeeding moms, it can feel particularly loaded.

Breastfeeding is your number one tool, but maybe your toddler isn't interested, or maybe YOU aren't interested. Are you destined to have a horrible day that begins with a stressful morning?

In the episode I share a few different things to consider, and give some practical support:

1 - Check in with YOUR expectations first.

2 - Set your little one up for success by talking about this issue outside of the moment.

3 - Support them to have something else to do.

4 - Playfully engage with them to put them into a receptive state and avoid having to tell them what to do/not to do altogether.

Want to learn more from me?
Watch my free, instant access workshop:
Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery

Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guide

Love this episode?! Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it. <3

**AUDIO FIXED**
Breastfeeding a toddler and a newborn... at the same time -> most people in the Western world think this is crazy.

And yet, I breastfed 2 kids (of different ages) for 3.5 years, and I hear from listeners all the time who are either doing it or considering it.

But, just like most things "extended breastfeeding" there aren't many places to find support when you start out on your tandem nursing journey.

In this final part of the Tandem Feeding series I give you all the things I wish I would have known as a first time tandem feeding mom,

I cover:

1. The most commonly asked tandemfeeding questions
2. Preparing to tandem feed
3. Navigating the early days of tandem nursing (including positions & sleep)
4. Common challenges
5. Some benefits of tandem nursing.

Resources & Links from the episode:
Sleep:

• Tiffany's Safe Bedsharing Guide
• University of Notre Dame Mother Baby Sleep Labratory FAQ
• La Leche League International Safe 7 Sleeping

Baby Wearing:

• Tula Toddler Carriers (not an affiliate - just an example of something available)
• Ring Sling with a newborn video
• Breastfeeding in a ringsling
• Woven wrap tandem carry with a woven wrap
• Back carry newborn (ONLY ATTEMPT IF YOU ARE EXPERIENCED)

Studies referenced in the episode:

• Sinkiewicz-Darol E, Bernatowicz-Łojko U, Łubiech K, Adamczyk I, Twarużek M, Baranowska B, Skowron K, Spatz DL. Tandem Breastfeeding: A Descriptive Analysis of the Nutritional Value of Milk When Feeding a Younger and Older Child. Nutrients. 2021 Jan 19;13(1):277. doi: 10.3390/nu13010277. PMID: 33478010; PMCID: PMC7835967.
• 
  
• Yate ZM. A Qualitative Study on Negative Emotions Triggered by Breastfeeding; Describing the Phenomenon of Breastfeeding/Nursing Aversion and Agitation in Breastfeeding Mothers. Iran J Nurs Midwifery Res. 2017 Nov-Dec;22(6):449-454. doi: 10.4103/ijnmr.IJNMR_235_16. PMID: 29184583; PMCID: PMC5684792.

Supportive resources for navigating judgment while tandem feeding:

• Podcast episode on Navigating Judgment
• Adventures in Tandem Nursing by Hilary Flowers, PhD
• KellyMom.com Tandem feeding

Want to learn more from me?
Watch my free, instant access workshop:
Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery

Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guide

Love this episode?! Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it. <3