Humorous Adventure

This is a tale that used to be about dungeons... Now it's mostly about walking in the woods with a friend, looking for mushrooms to put in your soup. Maybe haggling with the squash seller, or taking care of a neglected garden, or even just putting some jam on a good shortbread biscuit. And yes, sometimes you still go down into the dungeons with your friends, and kill monsters there, disarm traps, avoid spiked pits etcetera, etcetera. But when you come out now, it's not really about the gold and loot.

What could be simpler? On my very first day in this world, I was given the title of a count along with all the trimmings: a castle, name, lands and power. You'd think I had it made, but no . . . They seized my castle, took my lands, and now, I'm surrounded by enemies. Moreover, it's nothing but one headache after another with the authorities. And even though I wrested my castle back, the neighbors aren't going anywhere, and they live and breathe to tear off chunks of my land, and eliminate me, the new head of the family.

Kellen is moments away from facing his first duel and proving his worth as a spellcaster. There's just one problem: his magic is fading. Facing exile unless he can pass the mage trials, Kellen is willing to risk everything - even his own life - in search of a way to restore his magic. But when the enigmatic Ferius Parfax arrives in town, she challenges him to take a different path. One of the elusive Argosi, Ferius is a traveller who lives by her wits and the cards she carries. Daring, unpredictable, and wielding magic Kellen has never seen before, she may be his only hope.

Greg Rich should feel invincible. After all, he’s traveled through time, become one of the legendary Musketeers, and - most recently - prevented the Spanish army from attacking Paris. Instead, he and his friends are languishing in prison, having fallen into a trap set by Milady and the prince of Condé. But Greg didn’t come to the 17th century to sit in a jail cell and await execution. He, Aramis, Athos, and Porthos need to get to King Louis, who is in immediate danger of being overthrown by the scheming prince.

In ancient Egypt, Atticus agrees to raid a secret chamber underneath the library of Alexandria, dodging deadly traps, only to learn that on-site security includes two members of the Egyptian pantheon.

You are presumably looking here for clues to the shocking conclusion of this terminal audiobook, or the ending of the end. The end of the end is the best place to begin the end, because if you listen to the end from the beginning of the beginning of the end to the end of the end of the end, you will arrive at the end of the end of your rope.

I was in my garage, when the space elves addressed the whole world. They didn't call themselves space elves, of course, but most humans struggled to pronounce Khjurhnalva. They had a message for us: Forces that had eradicated their species' males were heading for Earth. The space elves offered us access to the System, as cooperation was vital to the survival of both our species. I, Mathew, know all of the above is bullshit. I saw the truth with my own eyes, heard it from their beautiful, deceitful mouths. No one believes me, though. A planet-wide, survival reality show? Ridiculous.

Theo Stein-Meyer loves being part of the Magic Misfits. Armed with his trusty violin bow, he completes the team with his levitation skills, unflappable calm, and proper manners. But when a girl named Emily begins to spend time with the group, Theo is surprisingly drawn to her. She seems to understand the pull he feels between music and magic, between family and friends. Then a famous ventriloquist arrives in town, and the Misfits are sure he (and his creepy dummy) are up to no good.

The zombies are disappearing. This might seem like a good thing, since zombies eat your brains, but normal human kid Jack Sullivan is suspicious. He keeps hearing an eerie shrieking noise that seems to be almost summoning the zombies - but to where, and for what (probably) foul purpose? Jack, his three best friends (maybe the only people left on Earth), and their pet monster Rover need to get to the bottom of this. Along the way they encounter a lot more than they bargained for.

Spot and his loyal followers have defended their castle from danger. However, there is no time to rest. With home safe and the Kingdom's army swept away, they must press forward if they want to secure their future, even if it means war. Accompanied by their friends and allies, Spot and Beatrice head to the Kingdom's capital to sort out this tangled situation. But armed conflict won't be their only worry. There are also the matters of family, and a strange new cult has attracted a great deal of attention.

Jack’s friends make a startling discovery: They may not be the last kids on Earth, after all. This is great news for everyone...except Jack. Once they’ve found other humans, his friends won’t stick around for long! Jack’s only hope for keeping things the way they are is to prove that everything here is perfect, life is crazy fun, and nothing else could be any better. After all, they live in a mind-clobberingly cool tree fort, speed through town playing real-life Mario Kart, have a crew of monster buddies, and battle zombies on the regular. That's as good as it gets!

The last kids may have escaped the forbidden fortress by the skin of their teeth, but there isn't much to celebrate. Thrull has what he needs to complete the Tower, Rezzoch will most certainly come to Earth, and the world as they know it will cease to exist. Except Jack's Cosmic Hand is now even more powerful than he realized, and it might just be able to stop the inevitable from happening. To get the answers he seeks, he'll need to travel farther than he's ever been. He must go...to the monster dimension!

When Silas Heap unseals a forgotten room in the palace, he releases the ghost of a queen who lived 500 years earlier. Queen Etheldredda is as awful in death as she was in life, and she's still up to no good. Her diabolical plan to give herself everlasting life requires Jenna's compliance, Septimus' disappearance, and the talents of her son, Marcellus Pye, a famous alchemist and physician.

Promoted early, Desmond McLaughlin and his mates are now full members of the Hegemony military, with all the rights and duties that rank includes. Given the benefits of achieving the rank of full adept early, Desmond and company elected to be deployed aboard the battlecruiser Fist of Defiance, a ship that just happened to be part of the Seventh Border Fleet. The same fleet headed by a certain admiral whose daughter was saved by Desmond and his girls.

The Library of the Unwritten in Hell was saved from total devastation, but hundreds of potential books were destroyed. Former librarian Claire and Brevity the muse feel the loss of those stories and are trying to adjust to their new roles within the Arcane Wing and Library, respectively. But when the remains of those books begin to leak a strange ink, Claire realizes that the Library has kept secrets from Hell - and from its own librarians.

Prince Liam. Prince Frederic. Prince Duncan. Prince Gustav. You've never heard of them, have you? These are the princes who saved Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Snow White, and Rapunzel, respectively, and yet, thanks to those lousy bards who wrote the tales, you likely know them only as Prince Charming. But all of this is about to change.

The fifth book of the New York Times best-selling series! Surviving their first winter after the Monster Apocalypse was no easy feat, yet Jack and his buddies waste no time springing to action against some of the nastiest, most evil monsters around. When Jack discovers his Louisville Slicer has new, otherworldly powers, he's thrown into epic training to find out what kind of destruction the blade can wield.

Someone has been stealing calves from Uncle Johnny's pasture, and it's up to Hank and Slim to put a stop to it. In the hopes of catching the "crinimals" in the act, they set up camp in the field just north of the canyon. But the stakeout isn't all fun and games.

Like the previous books in A Series of Unfortunate Events, there is nothing to be heard here but misery, despair, and discomfort, and you still have time to choose something else to listen to.

It takes only one halfling bomb, and Offi Numminen’s world is turned upside-down - or downside-up, really, since he lives in a hole in the ground. His goth cardigans and aggressive melancholy set him apart from the other gnomes, as does his decision to fight back against their halfling oppressors. Suddenly Offi is the leader of a band of lovable misfits and outcasts - from a gryphon who would literally kill for omelets to a young dwarf herbalist who is better with bees than with his cudgel to an assertive and cheerful teen witch with a beard as long as her book of curses.